Lessons of Experience
by BukkakeNoJutsu
Summary: While still an academy student, Uzumaki Naruto starts to learn the art of killing from a mysterious old man.  His lessons will be paid for in blood, sweat, and tears. He will get much more than he had bargained for,
1. School of Hard Knocks

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 1: School of hard knocks

By: BukkakeNoJutsu

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Disclaimer: This is my best attempt to mesh anecdotes of training in Southeast Asian martial arts with the Naruto Universe. Naruto is not mine, but, if he were, I would run him ragged with my insane martial arts ideas.

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Uzumaki Naruto had failed his academy exams a second time.

It had come down to a simple bunshin jutsu at the end.

Gods he hated the technique. His clone ended up emaciated and black-haired, struggling feebly before dispelling on its own.

It was so aggravating.

He had spent hours every day trying to perfect the basics on his own, but it was never good enough. Even after his second failure at the exam, he dashed into the woods to practice until he passed out.

If there was one thing that could be said about the blonde kid, it was that he was stubborn to the point of foolishness.

Upon waking covered in dew at the first light of dawn, Naruto prepared to start his unsuccessful training regimen again, but noticed another presence in the woods moving about in a small clearing.

It was an old man, even older than the Old Man Hokage if that were possible. He wore simple clothes of a white t-shirt, black pants, and black slippers, not minding the cold. The white-haired old man manipulated an almost plain looking one-handed sword with a deadly ease that appeared contrary to his years. His skin, tanned and leathery, held the faint tracery of numerous scars from countless battles. He was short and thin, but sinewy.

It was as if the old man had been pared down to the pure essence of a seasoned killer. It was reflected in his appearance and also his movements

Naruto had an uneasy feeling in his gut just watching the man practice, heedless of his eleven-year-old presence. Even though the man said nothing to him or even glanced in his direction, it was like being in the rare presence of an angry Sandaime.

Despite his young age and inexperience, the young boy shivered, not being able to help it.

When the old man stopped his movements, he asked aloud in a gravelly voice, "What do you want, Boy?"

The young jinchuuriki had reflected upon all the times before where he had asked strangers for a fair deal, or assistance, and had been ignored at best.

This would probably be no different, but he still had to try.

Naruto gathered up his courage and swallowed his pride replying, "Gramps, please teach me how to fight."

The old man laughed. It was like the sound of glass breaking.

Regarding the whiskered blonde with mirth, he looked at Naruto as if weighing his soul on an invisible scale. After a moment the old man muttered something to himself.

Smirking, he stated, "You've got a giant pair of balls to ask me that kid, but I've got no time for playground games. I don't fight, I kill, and I survive to keep on killing."

The statement was said with no hint of a boast, just simple, if not brutal fact. The honesty in the old man's words chilled Naruto to the bone.

Naruto stood at a precipice and instinctually knew it. He could jump one way or the other and have his life irrevocably changed. Some deep part of Naruto clicked. It was the same part that had survived all the loneliness, the apathy, and the unspoken hatred. Naruto wanted his life to change dramatically.

The boy decided, saying, "Whatever you want to teach, I'll learn."

The old man was tickled pink at the young boy's proclamation. From what he could sense the kid was one of the few that had his heart in the right place, time would only tell if he had the constitution to weather his type of training.

The old man smiled like a shark sensing blood in the water.

"It's not going to be that easy, boy. Unlike the styles of the lazy Hyuuga clan or the thieving Uchiha, my art has to be ingrained in the body and paid for with the flesh and blood of yourself and others. Are you prepared for that?"

Naruto nodded vigorously.

The old man continued, "I only have a few conditions. Do what I say when I tell you to do it, without complaint, and do not quit. If you fail on either count, your training will cease immediately. Lastly, if you abuse my teachings I will gut you like a fish, and I'll do so with the Hokage's blessing. You understand?"

Dumbstruck, Naruto still managed to answer in the affirmative.

"What is your name, boy?"

"Uzumaki Naruto."

A wave of recognition passed over that man's face.

"That's a respectable name. Mine is San. Let's begin."

The old man's sword vanished and a small piece of paper appeared in his hands. He threw it at Naruto like a shuriken.

The academy student caught it, and stared at it in puzzlement.

"Trust me on this boy, and gather some chakra into it."

A look resembling constipation crossed the young boy's face as he gathered his energies. The paper suddenly split in half down the middle. It left small, stinging cuts across his fingers where the paper had been sliced cleanly.

Smiling, San said, "Very good. It's in your nature to cut. This will be perfect."

Naruto mentally questioned the old man's definition of perfection as two, razor sharp, single-edged knives appeared in San's weathered hands.

"Before I can teach you how to kill, Naruto, you've got to learn how to cheat death. Now, avoid getting cut or stabbed. This will teach you distance, timing, accuracy, and sensitivity"

The old man rushed at him, attacking fluidly. The knives switching grips and angles of attack were a nightmare to deal with. Naruto was soon covered in small cuts and pinprick stabs.

Naruto mainly dodged, but then he tried using a standard Academy taijutsu block to counter a knife strike. It earned him a deep cut above his upper lip and below his nose that had scraped against his gums. Tears ran down his face, but he continued to dodge.

The old man commented, "Don't try to resist my blows force to force. If you try to counter my fluidity with brute force, you will direct my knives to your weakest areas, and you will die."

Naruto grew increasingly fearful. San could kill him brutally, and had no compunctions against showing that.

A knife flashed out cutting Naruto's left cheek. The strike severed the elastic tissue causing the cheek to flap out, exposing the contents of his mouth to the world. The boy gripped his face in shock, feeling his tongue poking through the bloody muscles of his face.

The boy froze in shock.

One of San's knives found his belly, tearing savagely.

The old man stared at him coolly stating, "If you get distracted by your injuries, you will die."

San ripped his long knife out of Naruto's abdomen causing the young boy to empty out his bladder and bowels before being claimed by unconsciousness.

San quickly got to work muttering a prayer with his hands laid over Naruto's dying body, but not touching him. The grievous injuries that the boy endured quickly closed themselves fading to pale pink lines.

The old man did not know medical jutsu. He only had one method of miraculously healing injuries, but only ones that had been inflicted by his own energy and intent. It was the same technique his uncle used decades ago to train and heal him. It was sorely limited in its scope of healing, but it came in handy numerous times.

Almost tenderly, he cleaned up his young student, abandoning filthy rags and replacing them with newly summoned clothes of a simple black and gray.

San waited for his young student to regain consciousness, watching the small scars fading much faster than usual.

When Naruto's bright blue eyes snapped open to meet his intense black ones with horror and fear, San felt the urge to explain things.

"That is what it means to learn my art of killing. It will not get any easier. If you learn to the best of your ability, I will teach to the best of mine. I will never, ever harm you permanently unless you betray my teachings. I will not abandon you and I expect you to do the same."

San expected the kid to crap out like all the others. There were few with the proper heart to use these teachings and even less with the constitution to learn them. Instead, Naruto's eyes widened with understanding. The white-haired old man was not actually being mean, but was actually being nice. San was acknowledging him, it was just that his art couldn't be taught in a nice way.

"You've got yourself a deal gramps."

The young boy held out his hand, which the old man had grasped in surprise. This young boy would endure his training, and thrive. San trusted his instincts that had kept him alive for so many years on this.

"Let's go get some food. My treat."

The blonde cheered, before noticing his attire.

"Hey, what the hell happened to my clothes?"

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The third Hokage watched these events through his crystal ball. He had a smile on his face that had not been seen for a good number of years.

Although he winced at the brutality of San's training, there was no questioning the results. San was a veteran of the great ninja wars for a good reason.

With no small degree of amusement, the Hokage quietly spoke, "So the Executioner finally has a new apprentice. Good luck, young Naruto."

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End Chapter 1

C&C welcome.


	2. A Deft Touch

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 2: A Deft Touch

By: BukkakeNoJutsu

Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine. San is mine however, and he is an evil old man. What a bastard.

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It soon became routine for Naruto to start training at first light every weekday with San.

Naruto had even taken to crashing at the mysterious old man's sparse apartment to wake up on time. The blonde orphan had grown used to sleeping on San's ratty old couch.

The old man would train him and then regularly buy him a hearty breakfast. Naruto, unused to such treatment, made sure to thank him each and every time.

San requested that Naruto keep the details of his training a secret for now. Naruto silently swore to never betray the old man who had acknowledged him.

Naruto's training now mostly consisted of an exercise that he mentally referred to as "tag." It was the very same practice that the white-haired man had inflicted on him during the first meeting. It was a game of attack and defense where the old man was always the assailant, and Naruto, a hunk of meat to be carved up.

The old man always had his knives during the exercise, but the games would always be different time after time and day after day. The terrain would always be different, sometimes leaving him very little room to dodge. He had to make due with his body positioning.

Sometimes, the retired ninja would wield a single knife in either hand, and use the empty hand and the rest of his body to counter Naruto's feeble defenses or to pull him in fatally close. Naruto grew used to being stomped upon, elbowed, head butted, and swept off his feet, while still having to deal with a knife or two threatening, and often succeeding, to gut him.

Through all this, the old man never drew Naruto's blood without iterating a lesson.

"Flank me, goddamit! Don't back up in a straight line. You'll run out of space as I rush you down. Move so that I've got to readjust to your position strike after strike," the old man swore, knives slicing the air, trying to drill the subtleties of evasion into the boy.

"If caught in a place where you can't evade, parry just enough to remain behind the force of my attack. Any lack of subtlety on your part will get you cut and killed. Be invisible," San hissed, drawing a line of red at Naruto's brow, sending trickles of blood into the boy's eyes.

The boy was learning to be quick and sneaky.

"Relax, boy. You can't expect to survive my attacks panic-striken. Calm yourself and breathe deeply."

Thus, the boy learned to be calm facing danger whether he was bleeding, gutted, crippled, or blinded.

It was not to say that old man San had no sense of humor while training. It was usually that if the old man was having a good time training Naruto, the odds were against Naruto having a fun time as well.

Sometimes to reiterate a lesson, the old man would specifically target a single point on Naruto's body, like his right eye socket. During one particular training session to remind the boy to keep his temper, San took a single knife in his right hand and spun it in his palm into an icepick grip. He then pummeled the boy's right eye with the pommel for any hint of a tantrum.

It was the crudest kind of aversion therapy.

When his student's face ended up bruised and swollen, San revealed that he was in range every time, if he chose to switch his knife to a forward grip, to shove his knife blade past the blonde's eye socket and into his brain.

"Anger will only get you and your loved ones killed," San spoke, weighed down by memories.

For Naruto, it was another important lesson of the many he would learn.

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The effects of Naruto's training did not go unnoticed by some of his classmates.

Hyuuga Hinata noticed the object of her crush showing up exhausted to class. It wasn't an uncommon sight for her to see him sleep through entire lessons uninterrupted, for no instructor other than Iruka-sensei bothered to wake him up.

The blonde's pranks that she had secretly found amusing were now few and far between, as if something else had captured his interest. Uzumaki Naruto was still confident and enthusiastic about his dream of being Hokage in the face of widespread disbelief and disapproval. That was what mattered most to her.

Inuzuka Kiba had noticed something off about Naruto, besides his new drab clothes with only the barest traces of orange. Both he and Akamaru detected the faint scent of blood, much of the time around Naruto. It was always his own. Normally, Kiba did not care much about the dead last student in his class, but the repeated instances disturbed him enough to once inquire about the situation. Naruto simply answered, "Training." It was enough to satisfy Kiba's curiosity for the time being.

Iruka noticed subtle changes in his most troublesome, and if pressed to admit it, his favorite student. The blonde boy had calmed down just a little along with his troublemaking. Oddly enough, Naruto usual boasts were intangibly less like posturing, and now held a certain genuine degree of pride.

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Outside of practices, Naruto found San to be a patient, and even kindly, old man. He encouraged questions from Naruto, but not whining. During their meals together, Naruto took the opportunity to learn more about his teacher and the art he was being taught.

During one of their first meals together, the whiskered boy asked, "Why do we train the way we do?"

The aged shinobi pondered for a second before answering.

"I am putting you through hell now, because it is best that you get put through the paces during practice, rather than against someone who won't hesitate to kill you for real. Also, before you learn how to kill, it is helpful to experience the kinds of pain you will soon learn to inflict, so that you won't end up using your skills thoughtlessly."

Naruto nodded thoughtfully. It made sense. The blonde knew exactly what how it felt to have his entrails spilled or his eye gouged out, and he would not do those things carelessly to another human being. It was like the how the Old Man Hokage, exasperated over a massive prank, had wanted him to be more "responsible."

San continued, "What you are learning now in your flesh, blood, and bones is a "deft touch." The Hyuuga clan in Konoha has a style of taijutsu known as the Jyuuken or Gentle Fist. Are you familiar with them?"

The young boy shook his head and the old man sighed at his ignorance.

"Their goddamn style isn't gentle at all. They have a bloodline advantage that allows them to strike at their opponents' vital points directly with chakra. Compared to what I'm trying to drill into you, they are clumsy oafs that allow much more room for error."

"Huh, what are you saying?" questioned confused Uzumaki Naruto.

"Boy, what happens when you fuck up when I attack you?"

The blonde brought his right index finger to his lip in a thinking posture.

"Umm…I end up cut or stabbed, blinded, missing fingers, coughing up pieces of my lungs..."

Naruto started to recall all the grievous injuries he received under San's tutelage, using his fingers to list them all.

The old man interrupted, "Don't you get it? The stakes are so much higher for you than a Hyuuga. In training, the worst injuries a Hyuuga gets is closed tenketsu, or chakra points. It feels like pins and needles compared to the shit I put you through."

Naruto sighed, "I wish I were a Hyuuga…"

"Enough of that bullshit, boy. The defenses I'm teaching you will far outshine any cheap bloodline tricks. If you get this right, you'll learn how not to be touched by damn near any attack. Not a kick, punch, weapon or even chakra strike will injure you. You'll be a goddamn ghost. All you need is a deft touch."

The blonde's eyes grew wide, becoming comically large.

"Gramps, will this involve some crazy awesome teleportation jutsus?"

San snorted in derision.

"Nope. Just good old-fashioned complete tactile mastery of timing, space, and distance. Also an inhuman sense of self-preservation, bordering on precognition. It's how I survived at my age being a frontline fighter against the ninetailed fox demon."

San regarded the slightly dampened enthusiasm of his student and remarked, "Cheer up, brat! We haven't even started to learn about offense."

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Naruto threw himself wholly into his training and, after a period of weeks, the results spoke for themselves.

What would normally inflict deep injuries on the boy left shallower cuts, any attack that would have cut him shallowly merely grazed him, and what would have grazed him before he dodged completely.

San nodded to himself noting the boy's progress.

Soon, Uzumaki Naruto would be ready to dish out the kind of damage he had been soaking up.

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Sarutobi kept an eye out on San's pet project, finding that he winced less and less as the Yondaime's legacy became more and more proficient. Still, it took a special kind of nin who could maim a child on a regular basis and call it training.

The Sandaime's stray thought caused special jounin Mitarashi Anko to sneeze violently, flinging snot over an order of dango.

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End Chapter 2

C&C welcome


	3. Knives Out

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 3: Knives Out

By: BukkakeNoJutsu

Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine, so I write stories to cope with my disappointment.

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Training Uzumaki Naruto in the arts of war often made San feel strangely sentimental. At times, it caused him to reflect upon his long life to avoid repeating the mistakes of his past.

San was a few years older than Sandaime. This meant that there were very few people left in Konoha who could reminisce with him. The one he was closest to had most of his time occupied with a village to run.

San could remember that for every square foot of The Village Hidden in the Leaves some brave nin fought, bled, and died for it.

The old man considered his long-standing acquaintance throughout the Great Shinobi Wars and beyond. Sarutobi did indeed deserve the nickname "The Professor" as much as San deserved his title as "The Executioner."

Sarutobi was known as "The Professor" for his unquestioned mastery of ninjutsu and his wisdom. If you were to ask the First Hokage about the origins of his mastery of Mokuton jutsu, the guy would just shrug as if saying "Fuck if I know" were too much of a hassle. He might conjure you a wooden vacation house to stop with the questions. Sarutobi, though, would extrapolate about theories about extreme doton and suiton alignments with glee. He was always just a little jutsu geek. San knew much better than to regard him as a bookworm. The man was a vicious fighter; blending god knows how many disparate elemental attacks into a nightmarish whole.

San's own reputation as "The Executioner" came from the way he dealt with the enemies of Konoha. While he was not the jutsu monster the Sandaime was, very few ninja who tried to stand toe-to-toe with him made it out alive and none unscathed. A nickname such as "the assassin" did not fit his style on the battlefield, because it implied that he needed to sneak around to keep himself safe. He didn't. San could walk up to an entire group of enemy-nin and demand their surrender or guarantee their slaughter. His vast clandestine successes made him a mysterious bogeyman even within Konoha's own borders. San was quite capable of stealth and guerilla warfare. One of his specialties was to infiltrate deep into hostile camps and eliminate traitors to Konoha who collaborated with the enemy. He would often leave a traitor's eyes, ears, and tongue back at the enemy camp, unless the traitor had a kekkei genkai.

Do that enough times and people are forced to give you a nickname.

Back in the earlier decades of shinobi combat, people didn't have to get too creative with naming their adversaries, unlike what happened with Iwa-nins and their sworn enemy, the Yondaime. The nickname "The Yellow Flash" had been entirely too awesome for the young man at first, but he had earned it in spades by they end of his reign.

The blonde had true grit. Witnessing the young man having his soul torn out willingly to save his village led San to regard him with nothing but the highest respect.

The least that San could do would be to train his legacy to the best of his ability.

During their first meeting in the woods, it wasn't hard for San to figure out that the lonely, malnourished blonde kid was Konoha's resident jinchuuriki. The whisker marks were a dead giveaway.

The kids had guts in spades.

Taking the kids through town for meals, San knew the general populace of Konoha, even now, mostly shunned Naruto. San sensed that Sarutobi probably had some subtle master plan for the kid.

Fuck that.

San's mission was clear.

The kid made no secret of his ambition to be Hokage. Even now, San could tell that the blonde, one day, would be a great hope to the village.

San would mold him into a terror; the type that would cause the more stubborn citizens of Konohagakure to be shitting bricks.

San smirked to himself.

It would be fun to see, after all these decades, if that snot-nosed punk Danzo was still a bed-wetter.

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One October morning, San interrupted practice to pose a question to his young student.

"Do you know why I'm teaching you to dodge knives instead of swords, or any other weapons?"

Naruto paused in his dodging to think a bit. He hazarded a guess.

"I dunno…don't most ninjas carry kunai?"

"Not at all, boy. Therein lies a secret to what I'm teaching you. At hand-to-hand close combat range, I can change my angles of attack with a small knife much, much faster than with a sword. The longer weapon needs more distance and time. You are being pressed to learn to deal with more attacks at a shorter distance with less room for error."

Something seemed to click in Naruto's head.

"Umm… so the closer an attack is to me the more danger I'm in."

San smiled.

"If seems like you're finally catching on."

Naruto beamed at rare praise from the old man.

The old man decided to press his luck and put forth another important question.

"Boy, what do you think is the basis of the defensive style you are learning right now."

Confident, the blonde kid answered, "That's easy. Speed and strength."

"Absolutely…"

Naruto expected another bit of rare praise from Sen. He already had a hand behind his neck in an "Aw, shucks" motion.

"…wrong!"

"What do you mean, Gramps? Isn't that all you need?"

Sen did an admirable job of suppressing the urge to hit Naruto upside the head.

"No. The basis of this style is precision. That's the reason I'm not having you do chakra exercises yet, or wearing weights. It's why we're training with razor sharp weapons."

"What about being strong and fast?" asked a deflated academy student.

"Precision must be ingrained before gaining strength or speed. They can always be added later, but my art requires an extremely high level of precision that is impossible for someone who already possesses great amounts of speed and strength to learn."

"How does that translate to fighting?" asked an intrigued Naruto.

San grinned shark-like again.

"With this kind of precision in mind, you'll become a scalpel rather than a cudgel, and be able to accomplish more with one square foot of space than a so-called taijutsu specialist could with ten feet of space. Trust me. It will all make sense when you start fighting other people."

San summoned a small brown paper-wrapped package to his hands and tossed it to the boy.

Naruto was stunned, not having received gifts from anyone besides the Hokage and Iruka-sensei. He tore open the package and could hardly contain his glee.

"This is why I asked you about the foundation of your defenses today. Happy Birthday."

Naruto gave his elderly teacher the fiercest hug his 12-year-old arms could offer, and then went to examine his new pair of knives.

They were of a simple design, almost elegant, with single-edged matte black blades. The handles were textured and comfortable allowing for various grips. Each blade had a spear point and they were about a foot long overall.

They were pragmatic and deadly, much like the old man teaching Naruto.

"Hey, do you want to gawk at them all day or do you want to learn how to use them?" asked San amusedly.

"I'm here to learn!" said the blond boy looking almost comically serious.

San allowed himself a chuckle before becoming serious again.

"Naruto, I need to teach you about my uncle first; the man who taught me how to kill. Understanding his intentions in creating the art we practice now is even more important than learning any specific technique."

Naruto listened intently as San's history lessons tended to be very entertaining and very violent. A textbook was in no way as interesting as someone who lived through those events.

San took a deep breath before revealing the true origins and intent of his art for what was probably the first time.

It would not be a pretty story to tell.

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End Chapter 3

C&C welcome


	4. Inheritance

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 4: Inheritance

By: BukkakeNoJutsu

Disclaimer: Uzumaki Naruto is not my creation, but if he were he'd leave his tips for Ichiraku's inside Ayame. Bow-chika-wow-wow.

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San had a sad, faraway look in his eyes as he began. Naruto noticed that there was almost a kind of twinkle in his dark eyes as the old man spoke.

"My uncle grew up in a time before there were major shinobi villages. Times then were vicious and lawless.

Villages, large and small, were harassed by roving bands of bandits and ninjas. Most of the time, these assholes would pillage, rape, and kill freely unless a particular village could afford mercenaries or had their own private army.

Living in a smaller village, his family was attacked by one of these gangs. His father died in the attack and the gang's savagery left his mother and sister barely alive.

With few options left, my uncle, when he was about your age now, joined a mercenary band to provide for his family. His mother and sister would stay in a larger, fortified village and he would earn his keep on the battlefield to provide their accommodations.

One day, a crude explosive trap killed several of his fellow mercenary nins, and wounded him severely. It tore off his left arm below the elbow and mangled his left leg, leaving him with a severe limp.

Half-crippled, his family would eventually run out of money and be left to fend for themselves without the protection of a large village, unless he found a way to make a living.

So he adapted. With only one hand, most ninjutsu and genjutsu were beyond him. Taijutsu and weapons were not.

He fought, traveled, and learned all over the Elemental countries. Often times, people would teach him out of pity or duty."

Naruto could not help but interrupt.

"How did your uncle become a ninja with his injuries?"

San smirked.

"That tricky old bastard combined everything he had learned and made due with ironclad control over his body and his chakra, and by becoming extremely precise and efficient in his movements and chakra usage.

You have to understand that, technically, he was at a severe disadvantage against pretty much anyone he came up against. What made him extraordinarily lethal, even legendary, was his mindset.

The core mentality of our fighting method centers around killing every single opponent you encounter regardless of their advantages and your disadvantages.

We always assume our opponents will be faster, stronger, more skillful, in better health, and with more experience than ourselves. We will kill them all the same. Our enemies have the luxury of being sloppy compared to ourselves because they have perfectly functioning bodies. That is why they die in great numbers before us.

I'm training you to be a vicious bastard, and to take _nothing _for granted. You'll do so with finesse and ease by the time I'm through with you."

San nodded at Naruto.

"Pick up your knives, boy. It's time to put theory into practice."

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The training that followed put all of Naruto's previous training with San to shame.

First, Naruto became intimately familiar with the knives San gave him. Soon Naruto's knives felt like extensions of his body, as natural as his whisker marks.

He could switch basic grips with his knives faster than he could perform handseals.

_Blade up, edge out. Blade up, edge in. Blade down, edge out. Blade down, edge in._

The best and most efficient ways to use these grips were hammered, and often stabbed, into him.

_Blade up, edge out. Blade up, edge in. Blade down, edge out. Blade down, edge in._

The boy learned all manner of tricks with his knives, like how to spin the weapons in his palms to change grip, and how to subtly change grips mid-strike.

The boy learned anatomy and how it related to his techniques. San tutored him on where to strike to maim, to cripple, to immobilize, and where to strike where no tourniquet or skilled medic-nin could prevent death. The jinchuuriki learned how to create ragged wounds by stabbing and tearing, the kinds of wounds that could not heal cleanly if they healed at all. Naruto discovered how to disembowel a man with the least amount of effort, even a man with a belly like an Akimichi with a small 2-inch blade.

Naruto had asked San once why they used single-edged knives, instead of more dangerous double-edged ones. San's answers always related back to control and precision. He learned how switch grips and how to increase the power of his strikes by using various parts of his body as fulcrums against the backs of his blades.

He learned knife tactics and strategy, how to use someone's defensive reactions to cause their downfall, and how to confuse the predictive abilities of doujutsu users and other advanced ninjas with his own. San offered this important piece of advice.

"Don't rely on just one attack or basic combination of strikes. You have got to move and react with your enemy like a dancing partner, or even a lover that you will ultimately have to kill. If you get preoccupied with doing a particular technique, they will predict your actions and cut you a new smile through your throat. Move with them like a shadow would."

Later, San took the knives out of his hands and taught him how to apply his knowledge and precision empty-handed.

Naruto found that his hands and reactions were even faster emptied as San taught him things like how and where to strike, and how to cause a spiral fracture of the spine in three places with a single smooth movement.

All these things Naruto learned so far were done without the use of chakra.

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As per San's request, Naruto did not wear his weapons in public yet, but stored them in his backpack. He also still kept his training sessions with San a closely guarded secret.

Naruto trudged though his Academy work, often bored. The only area were he improved visibly was with throwing kunai.

Even during those rare instances were he was partnered up with a classmate for taijutsu exercises, he mainly dodged, occasionally placing a flat palm solidly along exposed vital areas. His partners occasionally would get frustrated and criticize him for running away, but no one actually recognized what he was actually doing. He was training the same distance, if had a knife, to sink his blade completely to the hilt. They were moving and he was mentally carving them up.

In his spare time, the blonde boy experimented with chakra and basic Academy jutsu. His henge and kawarimi were fine, but he still could not get a handle on the basic bunshin technique.

Gods, he hated that technique.

Naruto even experimented once with channeling chakra into his knives, but, after nearly decapitating himself and cutting his kitchen table in half, he wisely decided to wait for San to teach him properly.

Naruto sourly mentioned the difficulties he had with the basic bunshin jutsu to San.

The old man snickered, saying, "Don't worry about that jutsu, boy. I'll show you one better."

The young boy got all sparkly-eyed and giddy.

"Really?"

"Yeah, I guess it's just about that time."

With that, after weeks and months of teaching offensive techniques, San began instructing Naruto in the use of chakra.

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San spent a solid week teaching Naruto the tree-walking and water-walking, and had the boy practice them on his own in private.

After feeling that he had mastered these practices sufficiently, they began playing their twisted version of tag atop the water.

It helped build Naruto's chakra control immensely as nothing disturbed the concentration needed for sparring on water quite like horrendous knife wounds.

Best of all for the blonde, Naruto could finally create decent bunshin.

It wasn't hard for Uzumaki Naruto to notice how the intensity of their training sessons dramatically increased. San did everything to stack the odds against Naruto's favor while sparring, forcing him to rely on himself with or without weapons.

One day without warning, San made good on his promise to show Naruto a jutsu better than the basic bunshin. He did so by doing using it on him viciously. Dodging the old man's attacks, Naruto was caught off guard as a solid clone burst from the surface of the water catching him with a hooking thrust right below his jaw. The clone's knife slid behind his jawbone, piercing through Naruto's tongue and the roof of his mouth. Naruto was caught like a fish wriggling on a line as his mouth filled with the coppery taste of blood.

After sealing the boy's wounds, San told Naruto that the technique was called the kage bunshin.

"Its approach is the opposite of a regular bunshin. It requires loads of chakra, and is good for people with large amounts of chakra like yourself. The technique is also great for information gathering. If a clone is dispelled, you receive its memories."

After teaching the boy the theoretical aspects of the technique, San challenged his student to pump a good deal chakra into the jutsu.

Naruto, never being one to do things halfway, used as much chakra as he dared, filling their practice space with a sea of blondes.

It was San's turn to be surprised as he saw the blonde boy was barely winded.

"Well…fuck. I guess it's time for a break."

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San appeared in the Hokage's office with a package. He greeted his old friend.

"Sarutobi, I assume you know what I've been up to for the past few months."

The Professor smiled warmly.

"I don't think you could have picked a better protégé than our young Naruto."

The older man snorted.

"Yeah…I wish could spend more time teaching him, but I feel my allotted time growing short."

San tossed the Sandaime a fairly weighty package.

"This is for the boy in case something happens to me."

The Hokage accepted the bundle without saying a word.

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From the time Naruto had first met San to where he had learnt the kage bunshin no jutsu, it had been almost a year.

Uzumaki Naruto's third opportunity to pass the Academy exams was fast approaching.

When Naruto asked San how much of his ability could he display at his tests, the old man just smiled evilly before replying.

"Go nuts, kid."

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End Chapter 4

Author's Note: FYI, Naruto's training with knives is actually based upon my own experience of knifework. I'm no master, but it's fun. :)

C&C welcome


	5. Show and Tell

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 5: Show and Tell

By: BukkakeNoJutsu

Disclaimer: Uzumaki Naruto is not my intellectual property. He's my muse.

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Naruto rocked back and forth on his heels barely able to contain his excitement.

The academy exams were about to start, and Naruto couldn't wait to begin.

Many of his classmates looked at him as a hyperactive weirdo wondering why he was so enthused.

"I am going to kick so much ass today they'll have to make me Hokage!" proclaimed Naruto proudly to a largely indifferent room.

Hyuuga Hinata silently cheered her crush on, and Akimichi Chouji and Inuzuka Kiba watched amused, but the others looked mostly annoyed or as if they could give a damn.

The blonde did not care in the slightest.

Naruto reflected on all the training he had to keep secret; how he bled and worked harder than he ever thought possible.

Just recently, San started to give him instructions on the basics of imbuing his knives with chakra. The old man explained that Naruto was lucky because he had a wind element alignment, meaning he could learn to manipulate the nature of his energy as a weapon to cut and pierce.

Just this morning, he had been fighting against San's kage bunshins so that he practice delivering fatal blows to a skilled human target, but fighting more than one evil old man was painful indeed.

Before Naruto left for the academy, San promised to pick up a new outfit for Naruto that contained some orange if the blonde tested well. Naruto didn't really need the extra incentive, but it would be welcomed, like a cherry atop a fudge sundae.

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Moving to the center of the room, the gray-haired instructor Mizuki spoke up, addressing all of the prospective genin.

"This year's exam will consist of two main parts, a jutsu portion where you demonstrate your mastery of henge, kawarimi, and bunshin, and a taijutsu portion where you demonstrate your proficiency in hand to hand combat."

The students quickly lined up to demonstrate their skills.

When Uchiha Sasuke's turn came around, he was cheered on by many of the girls in the class as he performed his techniques flawlessly. With a single handseal, the dark-haired boy created five bunshin, earning substantial praise from Mizuki and Iruka.

By the end, he looked quite pleased with himself.

A stream of students came and went, some succeeding and others failing.

It finally came to be Uzumaki Naruto's turn.

Umino Iruka sincerely hoped that his favorite student would be able to pass this time. The scarred chuunin knew that Naruto was a good kid who would do great things for the village one day.

Mizuki just watched impassively.

Naruto performed his kawarimi perfectly.

Iruka called out, "Naruto, henge into either myself or Mizuki."

Naruto did as he was asked and, with a poof of white smoke, transformed into a perfect copy of his favorite teacher.

Before Iruka could continue with the last, and most difficult, part of the jutsu exam, Naruto interrupted.

"Wait! I've got one more for extra credit…"

With another poof of smoke, the blonde examinee transformed into a cute, and busty, pony-tailed brunette. The attractive woman had a distinctive scar across the bridge of her dainty nose that did nothing to detract from her looks. She wore black, skin-tight short pants, with ninja sandals, and a standard chuunin vest. She wore nothing else underneath said vest.

The brunette licked her full lips, and sashayed towards the stunned chuunin. She slowly began to unzip her vest.

"Iruka-sensei, about that extra credit…"

The henge dispelled, leaving a smiling 12-year-old blonde boy.

"…do I get it?"

Naruto's antics received a good deal of laughter from the students in the room, much to the chagrin of a red-faced Iruka.

The chuunin sighed. It seemed that Naruto would always be a prankster at heart.

"Just create at least two bunshins, Naruto. That will be all."

Without the usage of any handseals, Naruto wordlessly created two perfect clones of himself.

Naruto noted that Mizuki looked vaguely irritated as if he just drank some sour milk.

Iruka was relieved and quite impressed.

"Great work, Naruto. You've improved a lot over this past year. You pass this portion of the exam."

Naruto cheered loudly.

Iruka was surprised even further as Naruto's clones cheered his accomplishment as well. They patted him on the back and shared a round of high-fives before being dispelled. Iruka gaped at the sight of Naruto's clones jostling his body. Those clones had flesh and blood bodies! The chuunin made a mental note to ask Naruto where he had learned such an advanced technique.

Umino Iruka was not the only one to notice the unusual features of Uzumaki Naruto's bunshins.

Uchiha Sasuke watched the blonde with clenched fists, his eyes narrowing.

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The students were led outside to the academy courtyard for the taijutsu part of their exam.

Here, Iruka addressed his students.

"You will be chosen, at random, to spar with another of your classmates. No weapons, or lethal attacks. You will fight until submission or knockout, or until five minutes has passed. We will interfere if a match becomes too one-sided."

A smaller student raised a hand, asking nervously, "Do we need to win to pass?"

"No not at all. Just make a good showing, and you'll do fine. Good luck to you all."

Names were called, and students made a good impression or did not. 

Soon, only two names were left.

Mizuki, holding a clipboard, rattled off the last two names,

"Uchiha Sasuke…"

The academy instructor almost sneered.

"…and Uzumaki Naruto."

Iruka was a little concerned hearing that the top academy student would fight against someone with the worst grades.

Cheers arose from Sasuke's fans.

Yamanaka Ino remarked, "This is not even going to be fair. Sasuke'll cream him."

Haruno Sakura yelled, "Kick his ass, Sasuke-kun."

Since it was later in the day, some parents had shown up by this time to watch the matches. Many of them cheered loudly for the last Uchiha. Some, like Inuzuka Tsume, inwardly cheered for the jinchuuriki because they were fans of underdog victories, but hardly anyone voiced their support publicly.

Sasuke spoke to his opponent like he did to most of his peers, condescendingly.

"Are we going to start or not?"

Naruto met his opponent in the center of the courtyard set aside as the examination area.

"Any final words, Dead Last?"

Unbeknownst to all, Naruto had learned much more than fighting from San. He also became fairly well versed in the fine art of swearing. On special occasions, like this one, he would grace the world with his knowledge.

Naruto gave Sasuke his most cheerful smile.

"Go suck a spiked cock, Sasuke-chan."

The blonde flipped off his opponent while still maintaining his cheerful visage.

The people in the audience who were paying attention were treated to the rare sight of an angrily flushed Uchiha Sasuke.

Nara Shikamaru groaned. This would not end well at all.

Mizuki yelled, "Begin!" before back peddling out of the way of an impending bloodbath.

Sasuke rushed at his opponent, intent on taking him apart piece by piece.

Everything went wrong.

The blonde dodged his fastest of strikes, by the narrowest of margins. Naruto was so close, but the Uchiha, time after time, failed to tag him. It was like trying to fight the wind.

Sasuke grew frustrated, yelling, "Fight back, god damn it!"

Naruto smiled a wicked smile, and complied. He simply did his best impression of San.

Sasuke launched a powerful right punch towards the annoying blonde's jaw, but Naruto blended with the movement, moving slightly to the side with a subtle parry with his left hand. He countered simultaneously with his right. It was a smooth movement, as if they had been choreographing a dance together all their lives.

To any outside observers, it looked like Sasuke had simply dived face-first onto Naruto's fingers. In reality, the blonde countered with a simple eye jab to the Uchiha's right eye socket, causing the dark-haired boy's eyes to water and his vision to blur.

It was all too fast how the blonde followed up his initial counter by sweeping his opponent off his feet, grasping his opponent by the neck, and then slamming the back of his head on the ground, using the momentum of Sasuke's fall and gravity viciously. Naruto spun quickly, stomping on Sasuke's groin _hard_, as if he would win a prize if he popped something.

The blonde even managed a series of kicks to floored vomiting boy's ribs before Mizuki got over his surprise enough to end the match.

The onlookers were shocked into complete silence, Sasuke's fan girls not able to process what happened.

Akimichi Chouji dropped the potato chip he was about to eat.

Even, Hinata flinched at the viciousness of Naruto's match.

Kiba cheered, not having seen a beat down that severe since, well, ever.

Iruka pulled Naruto to the side.

"Did you know that if you messed up with the eye jab, you could have blinded him permanently, Naruto?"

The blonde smiled and answered, "Yep," placing his hands behind his head.

"Sometimes, I just don't know what to do with you," exclaimed the scarred chuunin in exasperation, throwing his hands up in the air.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

In the end, Naruto received his Hitai-ite proudly while Sasuke Uchiha hobbled forward, clutching his abused groin, to get his. He tried to glare at Naruto, but the best he could manage was a pained grimace.

Naruto noticed one of the first year students, a spiky brown haired kid Giichi, about to burst into tears because he failed the exams.

Knowing the pain of this particular failure, Naruto went to comfort him, only to be beaten to the punch by Mizuki.

"Wow, Mizuki-sensei not being a dick. Now I've seen everything," thought the whiskered boy.

Iruka treated his student to a well-deserved meal at Ichiraku's ramen, and, about to inquire about the skills the blonde displayed at the exams, was interrupted by a fellow chuunin.

"Iruka we're on high alert. Apparently someone had stolen the forbidden scroll of seals. We need your help."

Iruka excused himself, and sped off to find the culprit.

Naruto trailed behind, out of sight.

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End Chapter 5

C&C welcome


	6. The Lord's Prayer

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 6: The Lord's Prayer

By: BukkakeNoJutsu

Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine. We have an open relationship.

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Canvassing a section of the woods surrounding Konoha, Umino Iruka stumbled across Mizuki just as the gray haired nin was wiping a bloodied kunai clean on the clothes of his victim.

Giichi's face was frozen into a rictus of terror with his throat slashed ear-to-ear. The scent of blood was heavy in the air.

Iruka gaped at the cruel act, before noticing a large scroll, discarded to the side.

"Why Mizuki?! For power?! You piece of trash!"

The gray-haired nin sneered.

"Well, if it isn't the do-gooder, and the demon brat."

Iruka looked back in shock to see his blonde student a few paces away. Even from this distance, the scarred chuunin could see the blonde's eyes glistening with tears.

Naruto wasn't close at all to Giichi, but it still hurt to see his life snuffed out senselessly.

Mizuki continued to talk, mocking the newcomers.

"This little shit was too sloppy in retrieving the scroll. I had to silence him."

The arrogant nin addressed the blonde boy.

"I was counting on you to fail, Naruto. I have always hated you and I wanted you dead instead of Giichi. You are the ninetailed fox demon that the fourth Hokage failed to kill twelve years ago. You killed my family along with Iruka's parents as well."

The world came crashing down around Naruto. Everything made sense; the glares, the loneliness, and the hatred.

On the verge of a breaking down, Uzumaki Naruto pleaded to Iruka, one of his few pillars of support.

"Am I really a monster, Iruka-sensei?

Iruka did not even require a single second to respond.

"Absolutely not, Naruto. The Yondaime sealed the fox into your belly, but you are not the demon. You are its jailer, and it your prisoner. You have protected the village your entire life."

Iruka turned to face the traitor.

"Uzumaki Naruto is just like me. I was also a lonely orphan who started playing pranks to get attention. He's a great kid and my favorite student, but you, you're nothing but a worthless traitor."

Hearing Iruka's heartfelt words instilled Naruto with a new sense of confidence.

Mizuki, growing impatient, threw his recently cleaned kunai at the pair, forcing them to scatter.

"You two are the same alright. You'll both die by my hand."

With that, the traitor unstrapped the giant shuriken at his back and readied himself to attack.

Iruka pulled out a pair of standard-issue kunai and prepared to rush at his fellow academy instructor when Uzumaki Naruto stuck his arm out barring his path.

"He's mine," said the whiskered boy with an uncharacteristically cold demeanor.

"Naruto…You can't possibly…"

"I'd do as he says," said a newcomer entering the clearing.

Iruka glanced at the stranger. He was an old man with short-cropped white hair and tanned skin bearing the faint tracery of scars. He wore simple clothes of a white shirt and black pants and sandals. The stranger carried a simple one-handed sword, its razor edge shining white in the sunlight.

"Who the fuck are you?" exclaimed an incredulous Mizuki, "And why are all these assholes popping up out of nowhere?"

"My name is San, retired jounin of Konoha, and I'm helping with the recovery of the forbidden scroll of seals. The answer to your second question is that karma is a vengeful bitch."

"What are you doing here, Old Man?" asked Naruto.

"With the scent of blood this heavy in the air, I came running. I heard some of that bullshit that bastard was trying to feed you. Rest assured, I would not have made you my student if your heart was anywhere but the right place."

He graced the blonde with an approving glance.

"Butcher him like a pig."

Naruto did not have to be told twice. He reached into his pack pulling out a single black knife in his right hand, before speeding off to confront Mizuki.

Iruka was a little put off by Naruto's non-standard choice of weaponry, and was not able to conceal the look of worry

The gray-haired shinobi almost laughed.

"Are you guys fucking serious, sending a little kid against an elite chuunin? I thought you guys got all pissy when I carved up the first one."

San placed a reassuring hand on Iruka's shoulder, whispering, "Trust me. This will be good."

Iruka could tell something had changed instantly with Naruto's demeanor. Even when Naruto thrashed the Uchiha earlier in the day, it had been with a sense of playfulness, although vicious to be sure. Here, the blonde was cold, with no jokes, and unnaturally focused. It was immediately unnerving.

Such subtleties were lost on Mizuki.

As the blonde closed the distance, the gray-haired shinobi struck when Naruto appeared within range. With his right hand, he swung his giant shuriken in a diagonal strike, hoping to slice the blonde open from left shoulder to right hip.

Naruto would have none of that. As the killing blow came closer, the jinchuuriki dodged minimally, lashing out with a single cut. That single cut sent Muzuki's weapon to the ground, along with the thumb of his right hand.

Before the traitor could marvel at his new stump, it traveled north, in a new location below his elbow.

Mizuki screamed.

Naruto relentlessly continued his attack. His knife slipped between the chuunin's ribs on his right side, puncturing a lung and making continued screaming a challenge.

Still, Mizuki persisted.

Then, the blonde boy sank his blade to the hilt in the traitor's abdomen, with such force that Mizuki's back slammed against a tree. Naruto kneed the bottom of his right fist, transferring the energy of the blow directly into the knife held within and aggravating the already mortal wound.

As if that were not enough already, San's apprentice used his right knee again, this time placing it against the top of his fist and the back of the blade.

Uzumaki Naruto dropped his weight like a stone.

The black knife tore downward through the abdomen and past Mizuki's groin, finally free of his abused flesh.

It was far too late for Iruka to flinch away. Naruto's entire bloodthirsty counter had taken only a few short seconds.

San interrupted the silence and Mizuki's death-throes, addressing Iruka.

"Take the forbidden scroll of seals back to the Hokage. You are not going to want to watch what happens next."

Looking quite pale, the chuunin grabbed the stolen item and made his way towards the Hokage's Tower, after saying his goodbyes to San and Naruto.

San walked up, comforting the shell-shocked blonde nin.

"Naruto, you did well, but there is one last thing you can learn from this dying bastard."

The old man dispelled his sword and summoned a small knife. Using his left hand, he carved a triangular symbol onto his right palm.

"Give me your right hand."

Naruto nodded dumbly, transferring his knife to his left.

San carved the exact same symbol into Naruto's hand.

"You know that technique I use to heal your injuries in training?"

"Yeah, sure."

"It is not medic-nin jutsu. It's a technique from my uncle. It's more like a contract. Do you remember how my uncle had to look for alternative ways to become an effective ninja?"

The young boy nodded. He remembered everything.

"The technique is actually an invocation to an old god of violence they have up north named Jashin-something or other. He's largely forgotten right now, except for some small, crazy, homicidal cults. Stay away from those crazy fucks, you hear?"

"Uh…okay."

"The technique's not intended to heal. The invocation to Jashin restores your enemy for the main purpose of committing even more violence against them. It's great for torture and interrogation, and, as my uncle discovered, it works alright in training. The method only works for injuries committed by your own hand, and regenerates only things attached to the body. Your target has also still got to be breathing. Let's hurry up before the pansy craps out on us."

San pressed his right palm to Naruto's whispering an ancient prayer.

Naruto felt an absolute cold in his palm that swiftly disappeared, leaving skin unblemished.

"This technique can't be learned or copied. It can only be inherited. Repeat those words to invoke it."

San gestured towards the shivering body of Mizuki with disdain. 

"This useless shit-stain here is a traitor to Konoha, and a child-killer. It's chakra-intensive, but use the prayer as many times as you feel necessary."

The ANBU team that eventually arrived was treated to the nightmarish sight of a limbless Mizuki weeping under the careful ministrations of a 12-year-old blonde boy and his elderly teacher.

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Iruka consulted with the Hokage at the end of a day that had just been bizarre and disturbing.

"Are you sure that it is a wise idea to put them on the same team? They'll likely end up killing each other."

It was a very rare occasion that Umino Iruka felt the need to question the wisdom of his leader.

The Third Hokage just smiled in response.

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End Chapter 6

C&C welcome.


	7. A Pocketful of Aces

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 7: A Pocketful of Aces

By: BukkakeNoJutsu

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Disclaimer: Naruto doesn't belong to me. He belongs to Mitarashi Anko. He's strapped to her bed right now as we speak, doing unspeakable things.

Things that would make grown men weep.

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Heading back to Konoha proper, San observed the disheveled state of his student Uzumaki Naruto and, despite the tragedies and betrayals of the day, couldn't stop himself from laughing.

"Fuckdamn. Boy, you look more like a butcher's apprentice rather than a minty fresh genin," remarked the old man in reference to Naruto's blood soaked clothing.

An active sense of humor was one of the ways San kept himself sane despite an unusually long life on the battlefield.

"Get cleaned up first, and I'll treat you to dinner. You've earned it."

San was rewarded with an enthusiastic shout, as the promise of free food rarely failed to lift the orphan's spirits.

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Upon arriving home, San handed Naruto the graduation gift that he had promised, a brand new suit of clothing with some orange on it. It was a tasteful black and orange jacket and pants combination that, despite its unusual coloring, managed to look quite professional and slightly intimidating.

"Thanks, gramps. I'm surprised that you went through with it."

"Shit, I'm not the biggest fan of the color orange, but who cares what you wear as long as you're capable, right?" said San with a shoulder shrug.

Naruto took a quick hop in the shower and then tried out his new outfit.

San had to admit that the colors fit Naruto's personality better, and the outfit still managed to make him look less like a little kid. The female clerk at the store was perfectly right.

Naruto was positively beaming in his new outfit. It was so…cool. The blonde tied on his new hitae-ite to his head. Naruto left his pack by the door, and was about to exit to head off to dinner.

An amused San stopped him first.

"There's one last thing. Feel free from now on to wear your gear in public," stated the retired ninja.

"I can? Really?" asked an excited Naruto.

"Yeah, there's no more need to hide now."

Naruto reached inside his pack, pulling out his two knives. He then strapped a sheathed knife to each thigh, completing his ensemble.

San felt a chill run down his spine. Every element fit the boy just right. It was like the old man was witnessing the birth of a new legend. Shaking himself free from the premonition, San focused on the present.

"Where to, boy?"

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Interestingly, Naruto did not choose a place to dine right away, so the both of them ended up walking around waiting for inspiration or hunger to stike first. San had an inkling suspicion that the boy simply wanted to strut around a bit in his new outfit, so the old man indulged him a little.

"Let the village see the Yondaime's legacy now," thought the old man with glee.

Naruto walked by heedless of the reactions of people around him, his old habit of ignoring the indifference or hostility of the general population of Konoha coming into play. San noticed that the reactions varied wildly. Some were in shock, others fearful, and an even smaller contingent regarded the blonde with a tentative respect.

Whether people were reacting to the jinchuuriki's new outfit, knives, or hitae-ite, or to rumors of what happened to the Uchiha or to Mizuki, San knew one thing. The status quo concerning Naruto was changing forever. San had heard what occurred at the academy exam from Sarutobi, and was greatly amused.

The retired jounin was considering telling the boy to hurry up and choose a restaurant already when two kunoichi sauntered up to Naruto. One was unrecognizable in full ANBU gear and the other was unmistakable in her trademark trenchcoat and fishnets, Mitarashi Anko.

The special jounin bent forward speaking into his ear, "I heard what you did to that bastard Mizuki. I must say that I approve. See you around."

She then tousled his blonde hair playfully, before heading on with her silent friend.

Naruto was too busy blushing at the attention to protest her actions.

San chuckled at his student's reaction. Despite what he had learned, Naruto in some ways still a young kid.

"Old man, w-what the hell was that?"

"Don't ask me, boy. Even though I was married, I still don't understand women. Killing an enemy is a whole lot easier. Hell, even killing scores of enemies at the same time is easier."

Naruto stared at his teacher, incredulously.

"Wait a minute, you have a wife?"

"'Had' as in past tense; a lifetime ago," corrected San.

Naruto froze in his tracks.

"Um…Sorry for bring it up, gramps," mumbled an apologetic blonde.

"No apologies needed. We had a good run, but we were just short on time together."

San noticed the mood had slightly darkened, and decided to correct things.

"I'll tell you a funny story. Remember that prayer to Jashin I taught you earlier today?"

"Sure I do. What about it?" asked the boy, more than a little curious.

"If not for that damned thing, I wouldn't have met my future wife," replied the older nin with a wink.

"How the hell did that happen?" wondered the young blonde out loud.

"She was just a normal civilian, a baker, during the Great Shinobi Wars. When war had managed to erupt on Konohagakure's very doorstep, an enemy-nin tried to use her as a human shield against me. She was facing death either way, so I stuck. I killed him, and healed her. That's how we met."

Uzumaki Naruto let out a low appreciative whistle.

"Wow old man, even your romantic stories have blood and guts in them."

San chuckled at his student's astute observation..

"Sometimes, violence can lead to some very interesting courtships. Maybe one day if you're lucky, some drunk kunoichi'll take pity on you and let you store your purple headed kunai in her fleshy equipment pouch. She might wake up and then try to kill you, and, before you know it, your children will be attending shinobi academy. Life is funny that way,"

At that very moment, Nara Shikaku sneezed hard, spilling his cup of sake and cursing.

San took the opportunity to summon a very old, and very worn picture frame to his right hand. It contained a wrinkled, and faded photograph of a young, cheerful red-headed woman.

"Here," said San offering Naruto a look into his past.

"She's really, really pretty, Gramps," exclaimed Naruto.

"Yeah, she was…Fuck, all this reminiscing is making me thirsty."

San pointed to a nearby bar that catered exclusively to shinobi.

"How about a liquid dinner, boy?"

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When Naruto first set foot through the bar doors, he was met with immediate disdain.

A bleary eyed chuunin wobbled towards the pair bellowing, "What the fuck do you want here demon br---Urkh!"

The drunk nin's comments were quickly interrupted by a long line of gleaming steel held by an irate old man.

"I suggest you hold your tongue, cocksucker, lest you find it carved out of your mouth," growled the white-haired nin.

Most of the bar patrons of the bar did not recognize San, but gave both newcomers a wide-berth, and much more respect. It was common knowledge that one does not end up a legitimately mean old man in a shinobi village by being a pushover.

Once the short lesson in politeness was over, punctuated by the aforementioned chunnin bolting from the bar in soiled pants, San ordered some sake and good deal of takoyaki for himself and Naruto.

"Naruto, now that you've started to use my teachings for real, it's time to deal with some of the limitations of what you've been taught."

"What do you mean by limitations, old man?" asked the whiskered boy in surprise.

"Not everything can be killed so simply with knives, swords, or even chakra strikes. Some enemies can't be cut so easily."

"Gramps, I've seen you move. I challenge you to name one enemy that you couldn't mop the floor with?" joked Naruto

"The Kyuubi," replied San in all seriousness.

"What you have learned so far is all foundation. It's what will keep you safe and kill 99.9 of your enemies, but there are still those few that will test all you know and beyond."

"So, how did you deal with the nine-tailed fox, old man?"

"It was a stalemate, for a time. It could not manage to land any of its strikes, and my attacks weren't damaging it. If the Kyuubi continued to focus on me, I would have eventually faltered and died, but it grew bored of our game. It completely ignored me in favor of targets that could not dodge half as well. I helplessly watched many a comrade die that day."

Naruto looked down at his small sake cup, ashamed of what was sealed into him. San noticed the taint of self-loathing on his student.

"It's not your goddamn fault, boy! If not for you, we all would have been dead years ago. You should have been seen as a hero to this village."

There were no words spoken between teacher and student for quite a few moments.

"Thanks…I really mean it," replied Naruto, finally breaking the silence and feeling a much better.

San returned the sentiment with a bright smile.

"The reason I bring up my own failure is to show you that the style you know right now is one specialized for killing normal men, not demons or other inhuman monsters. What you need, besides constant refinement, is a few trump cards to pull out against the inhumanly tough bastards you'll undoubtedly come across."

"Is this where I start to learn some wicked flashy jutsus?" asked the eager jinchuuriki.

"No. Let's get this absolutely straight. I'm not going to hand you over some jutsus as if you were a red-eyed bastard. Instead, I'm aiming to make you a much stronger shinobi than I ever was, but one with a pocketful of aces."

San's grin promised sinister things in the future.

"You game?"

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End Chapter 7

C&C Welcome.


	8. The Virtues of Attentiveness

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 8: The Virtues of Attentiveness

By: BukkakeNoJutsu

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Disclaimer: Uzumaki Naruto is now my intellectual property, but today is Opposites Day so it doesn't really count.

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Because of San, Uzumaki Naruto experienced a great many firsts. His first experience of being disemboweled, his first memory of sparring with a collapsed lung, and his first time being stabbed in the eyes and crying blood were all some of the more memorable milestones of Naruto's training with the old man.

Naruto was experiencing another historic first. Today was the day he was supposed to find out his team assignments and here he was, struggling with his very first hangover.

Judged by the standards of its kind, it was a beauty. By the young blonde's standards, it sucked quite badly.

While the knife injuries Naruto received were extremely painful but relatively quick to heal, the hangover lingered and ached with no end in sight.

With his head pounding like a kettledrum, Naruto gulped down a liter of tap water for his parched mouth and made his way, red-eyed and irritable, to the academy.

Entering the sparsely populated classroom wearing his new black and orange outfit, a graduation gift from San, and his knives, Naruto cut a striking figure. With his actions from the previous day as well, the blonde boy was a major topic of discussion among his peers.

Yamanaka Ino walked up to the boy intent on saying something disparaging as a result his treatment of Uchiha Sasuke in the final exam. Naruto shot her such a witheringly dismissive glare that she, quite wisely, clamped up immediately. Perhaps her family's latent psychic gifts had given her a premonition of a severe ass kicking in her immediate future. Nevertheless, she walked away spooked, but perfectly intact.

Unlike the blonde girl, the pink-haired Haruno Sakura was not as easily cowed, and went to give the blonde a piece of her mind for humiliating her crush publicly. She paid no heed to his bloodshot eyes or his anxious fingers twitching towards holstered knives. She let loose a righteous tirade from her young mouth in hopes of impressing the object of her affections.

On any other day, Uzumaki Naruto would have stood there and taken his lumps good-naturedly.

Naruto had, at one point in time, a major crush on the studious girl, but training with San had given him a ridiculously low tolerance for bullshit. Over the past year, Naruto found that being treated like trash by someone you liked was bullshit of the highest order. Even so, the young genin still had a bit of a soft spot for the Haruno girl.

"…Nobody likes you, Naruto. You can't compare to Sasuke. You don't even have a cla—urkgh!"

The basic fact the Uzumaki Naruto was not a cheery morning person was seriously compounded by a severe hangover, and the insults heaped upon him from the Haruno girl.

Uzumaki Naruto was not going to play nice today.

Haruno Sakura was interrupted not just in mid sentence, but mid-word. She was wholly unprepared as Naruto smoothly; even lazily, finger flicked her in the throat, hard.

She gagged and flinched away from him. When Sakura recovered enough to try to make a single protest, he flicked her throat even more viciously, leaving her coughing painfully and teary-eyed.

She managed to regain her composure and tried to glare at him, but he had already walked past her, blissfully ignoring her as he made his way to his seat as if she didn't matter. Sakura's pride almost stung more than her throat did.

Clearly, Uzumaki Naruto was in a rare mood today, and not one to be fucked with.

Unfortunately, his jounin-sensei-to-be did not get that memo.

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Hatake Kakashi made his way to meet his new genin team for the first and probably last time.

Beforehand, he and the other jounin instructors had been given some basic reports about the capabilities of their prospective students.

As is common much of the time with paperwork, the reports given to Kakashi were woefully out of date. As one more interested in the contents of his favorite book series rather than in the latest gossip of Konoha, the jounin had absolutely no clue about the incidents that occurred the other day. He was expecting an Uchiha headcase, a bookworm, and a class clown of dubious ability. The one-eyed nin was also expecting to fail them easily.

Any experienced ninja, including Kakashi himself, could tell you that expectations can kill.

Had this been any kind of mission outside of the village, the experienced jounin would have double and even triple checked his information sources, but the expectations of failing another genin team blunted his normally sharp senses.

Kakashi arrived to meet his team over two hours late.

The jounin had pushed open the slightly ajar door to the classroom, and narrowly avoided a brick that had been balancing between the door and doorframe.

Kakashi faced his students; a sullen Uchiha, a pink-haired kunoichi, and a sorely disappointed blonde. They looked hungry and irate. The tired blonde looked particularly angry for some reason.

Kakashi tactlessly spoke his mind, "I think I hate you all already."

The near-miss with the brick sparked Kakashi's ego. He was planning to test them tomorrow, and let them enjoy another day of being genin, but no longer. He would test them now, and get it over and done with.

"Meet me on the roof," the masked ninja spoke before vanishing.

Hunger and inexperience made the rest of Team 7 slower to follow Kakashi, yet they still arrived dutifully.

With all of them reunited on the roof, Kakashi suggested an obligatory icebreaker.

"How about we go around in a circle and share some information about ourselves like your name, likes, dislikes, and your goals for the future? You first."

The senior shinobi pointed to the pink-haired girl.

"What about yourself, Sensei? Shouldn't you go first?" interrupted the lone female of Team 7.

The jounin shrugged carelessly.

"Whatever. My name is Hatake Kakashi. My likes and dislikes are classified and I don't have a dream for the future."

The three genin blinked in surprise at the uninformative introduction.

The jounin then pointed to Sasuke, hoping that the dark-haired boy would not want to question his methods and simply get on with it.

"Uchiha Sasuke. I don't really have a dream, but an ambition to one day revive my clan and to kill a certain man."

"_Figures,"_ thought Kakashi as he pointed towards the girl.

"I'm Haruno Sakura. What I like…" she trailed off to gaze at the Uchiha.

"What I dislike…" with a frown Sakura turned to glare at Naruto, who simply flicked a finger towards her, causing her to flinch involuntarily.

"My dream is to…" she shyly glanced towards Sasuke again with a blush.

Kakashi held in a sigh. With how obsessed the girl was over the last Uchiha left in Konohagakure, she'd be lucky to be killed in action immediately, instead of captured alive and tortured. It would be best if she failed immediately. The efforts needed to prepare her mentally and physically would break her.

The jounin then gestured towards the blonde to start.

"My name is Uzumaki Naruto. I like ramen and training. What I dislike…" Naruto paused to think a moment.

He considered all the things that San had taught him.

"…I hate people who take things for granted. My dream is to become the best hokage ever."

"_Interesting,"_ thought Kakashi.

"Alright then, meet me at training ground fourteen in ten minutes."

With that the older ninja vanished again.

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Hatake Kakashi reflected on his first impressions of his team. If they didn't pull something spectacular out of their asses, they would fail, and fail horribly. It really wouldn't be entirely their fault anyways. Konoha's relative prosperity and compassionate nature stunted the practical skills and values necessary to thrive on the battlefield. Growing up as a genin during a time of war, Kakashi knew that times had changed drastically.

Now, academy students oft ignored the practical values of teamwork and harsh training for the popularized conception of ninjas. Kakashi largely failed his prospective students because they focused solely on themselves and flashy jutsus. In his previous experience as an ANBU commander, the jounin knew that these types of ninja were a pain in the ass to deal with, and, much of the time, a liability during missions.

The trio of genin arrived at the training ground. Kakashi stared at the recent academy graduates noticing some hints of nervousness and anticipation.

"You have one more test to complete before you officially become genin. The failure rate of this test is 66. If you fail, you get sent back to the academy."

"What the hell? Aren't we genin already?" exclaimed an annoyed Naruto, voicing his teammates frustrations outright.

Kakashi sighed out loud.

"The academy exams only test for those with the potential to become genin. Of the 27 academy graduates, only about 9 will become genin. This is the final cut."

The jounin pulled out two small bells from the equipment pouch on his hip.

"The test is simple, whoever gets a bell from me graduates, but there are two bells and three of you. At best, one of you will still fail and get sent back to the academy."

"We're genin. How are we supposed to face down a jounin? " asked Haruno Sakura nervously.

Kakashi smirked through his mask.

"That's not my problem. I only have one bit of advice for you all. Come at me with everything you've got: jutsus, weapons, dirty tricks, or whatever. You'll need every last bit."

"Are you fucking serious?" asked Naruto disbelieving, almost quivering with anticipation.

Mistaking the blonde's incredulity for fear, Kakashi calmly stated, "Come at me with intent to kill otherwise you'll fail. Prepare yourselves!"

With that, Kakashi stepped a few paces backwards facing his new team.

"Begin!"

Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Sasuke quickly dashed off in opposite directions to find cover and to come up with their own sound tactical plans. They knew in their hearts that it would be downright suicidal for a genin to try to take on a jounin in a straight fight.

Naruto just stood his ground, not believing his luck.

The jounin seemed unsurprised that Naruto did not go into hiding, and even had the gall to take out a small orange book and start reading. The grown man was giggling girlishly, not even paying the slightest attention to the blonde.

The young whiskered boy knew that he was probably outgunned and outclassed. His opponent was a jounin, with probably more strength, speed, reach, experience, and jutsus then he himself had. On paper, the odds were horribly stacked against him.

Those were the same kinds of odds that San had been training him to thrive against. Naruto knew deep down in his soul that the jounin was not be as precise as himself or as bloodthirsty or lethal as the old man.

In comparison to the old man, this Kakashi asshole would be a cakewalk.

Naruto calmly walked up to the jounin, drawing one of his knives out from a sheath.

It was time to give his team leader an appetizer for the feast to come.

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Hatake Kakashi was enjoying the start of a particularly juicy passage from his favorite book series. The perky pigtailed blonde Naruko was about to be comforted by the older, more experienced dark-haired Yukie. For the one-eyed jounin, scenes like these elevated hot girl-on-girl action to an art form.

He lazily waited for the telltale warning signs of a clumsy genin approaching while savoring one of his favorite pastimes.

Kakashi's personal reflections on art were rudely interrupted.

As if by magic, the black blade of a knife appeared through the palm of his left hand, the hand whose fingers held and promptly dropped the Icha Icha volume.

It was an impossibly precise stab sliding between the metacarpals, barely jarring the bones, but then Uzumaki Naruto twisted and tore his knife free from between the knuckles of Kakashi's middle and index fingers.

It was part of Naruto's brutal training that had taught him when to be exacting, like a surgeon with a scalpel, and when to be crude and vicious. Kakashi was now reaping the benefits of San's training with the young jinchuuriki.

The jounin almost felt like crying, it was this wounded left hand that he used most to fully savor the Icha Icha experience in private, but now the older nin had bigger worries at the moment. With his left hand entirely useless, the jounin was prevented from using most of his formidable jutsu library. Kakashi hastily wrapped a bandage around his torn up left hand. He had to come up with something, anything.

Naruto smiled eerily, much like San would.

Kakashi was panicking as a result of him misjudging the situation quite badly.

Now the blonde was almost toying with him. The boy sometimes used a precise amount of chakra channeled through his knives to throw off the jounin's sense of distance and safety off the deep end. The blades lengthened or shortened according to the blonde's whims. It was nature manipulation similar to what Sarutobi Asuma was capable of with his trench knives. The idea of that type of manipulation in the hands of a rookie genin was frightening. The fact that the boy used the technique sparingly, made things even worse. Kakashi felt like a fool as he backpedaled wildly, hoping to dodge strikes that might not have even been there in the first place.

Growing increasingly desperate and increasingly bloodied, Kakashi lifted up his hitai-ite and exposed his sole Sharingan eye.

A fully matured, Sharingan eye possessed the ability to discern the most likely movements an opponent would make in the future. Some referred to it as a limited type of precognition, but it was a best a refined form of educated guessing. If one compared an opponent's attack to a story in a book, the Uchihas were then very good at reading an opponent's movements at the onset and then accurately guessing what would happen at the very end.

If you mentioned that observation to San, the old man would laugh and call it utter bullshit. He might even say something like, "That's nice in theory and all, but I'm not going to rely on a single strike, or two, or three, or a dozen. I'm going to kill you regardless of how you move or how good you can guess."

San and Naruto's killing art was, at its core, ruthlessly opportunistic. If their opponent moved, or if they didn't, or if they tried to counter or evade all didn't matter at the end. Their methodology was not concerned about pulling off perfect textbook techniques. It was about killing and not getting touched in return.

Focusing his single red eye on the whiskered boy, Kakashi realized his mistake. Instead of seeing a single path the genin would take, the jounin saw dozens. A hundred phantom Uzumaki Narutos filled his vision, wounding him in myriad ways. It was a much different feeling than that of an overt sense of raw killing intent. That, at least, was something Hatake Kakashi had much experience dealing with.

This was something else, something ghastly and alien, as if the boy quietly held an enormous untapped potential for extreme violence.

Naruto wordlessly pulled out a small amount of folded explosive tags. Kakashi cringed as he saw the genin quickly attach three a piece to the handles of each of his knives. It was a sinister tactic attaching extra explosives to those knives, Kakashi realized. Not only would the blast radius of each explosion be much bigger, but also the knives would be turned into deadly bits of shrapnel.

Kakashi prepared himself to use the shushin technique at the very first sign the blonde would let loose his knives.

He didn't.

Naruto held onto his knives, closing the distance, and dodging the wounded jounin's frenzied counters, often by a hair's breadth.

Kakashi noticed Naruto's smirk growing wider, before feeling a faint twinge of chakra in the air.

The blonde boy exploded, and the world went dark for Hatake Kakashi.

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As he watched the explosion destroy his kage bunshin and knock out the jounin, Naruto felt that he had taken San's advice from the other day to heart. The old man told Naruto that in terms of force, some jobs needed a scalpel while others required a hammer. In this case, it was something highly explosive.

Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Sasuke ran into the clearing caused by the massive detonation.

"What happened?" asked the stunned girl.

Naruto smiled and shrugged.

"I cheated with the help of half a dozen explosive tags."

The other two genin just gaped. Gaping, for Uchiha Sasuke, involved a slight opening of the mouth unrelated to a scowl or grimace. It was an unusual sight.

Naruto snapped his fingers in recollection.

"Oh yeah, before I forget. Consider this a peace offering."

The blonde tossed them each a bell. Even Sasuke was caught off guard by the gesture.

"Why?" asked the dark-haired boy, his anger receding.

"It's simple. If we're going to depend on each other as a team, we could at least try to get along."

"What about a bell for yourself?" inquired Sakura.

The blonde laughed out loud.

"I have something much better in mind."

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When Hatake Kakashi finally came to, he was badly singed, but the tear through his left hand and his other injuries were miraculously gone.

The one-eyed jounin looked around and noticed the three genin watching over him. Both Haruno Sakura and Uchiha Sasuke had a bell in their hands.

"So, do we pass?" asked a bemused Uzumaki Naruto.

In the blonde's hands was Kakashi's orange Icha Icha volume with an explosive tag tucked into it, like a bookmark.

Kakashi could only nod dumbly.

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End Chapter 8

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C&C welcome


	9. Waking Up

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 9: Waking Up

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Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

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Umino Iruka sat in the Hokage's office going over some last minute business concerning the end of the academic school year.

It was nothing but paperwork, paperwork, and more paperwork, but the kindly old Hokage made for some pleasant company.

Iruka was expecting a predictable afternoon and sighed under his breath.

Outside, the sound of approaching footfalls grew louder and louder.

Both men watched silently as the doors of the Hokage's office were flung wide open by a disheveled and singed Hatake Kakashi.

"Hello Kakashi. How are you finding your new team? " greeted the old man with his most cheerful grandfatherly smile.

The experienced jounin was clearly not feeling like sunshine and rainbows.

"With all due respect Hokage-sama, but just what the _hell_ has Uzumaki Naruto been learning?"

The leader of the Village Hidden in the Leaves had a perfectly innocent, "Who, me?" look that might have been passable if he had only been sixty or so years younger

Kakashi was terminally unfazed.

Seeing that his opening stratagem did not work, the famed tactician then quickly adopted a thinking posture, rubbing his aged chin.

"Hm…I seem to recall that young Naruto has been training in the mornings with a retired shinobi."

"Which retired shinobi, Hokage-sama?" inquired the jounin almost non-chalantly through clenched teeth.

The Hokage smiled.

"I don't think you would know him by name, but you may have heard of his work during the Great Shinobi Wars as The Executioner.

Umino Iruka just blinked in confusion, not understanding the reference.

Hatake Kakashi just froze, his face growing pale underneath his mask, and his stomach growing queasy.

The Executioner.

Kakashi did his best to suppress a shudder.

Some names and deeds were never glamorized in the annals of Konohagakure's official history and never will be.

No historian will write flowery accounts of how Morino Ibiki had to drive bamboo spikes under a traitor's fingernails to get them to speak,, or how Nara Skikaku accidentally strangled a child to death with his shadow to avoid compromising an A-rank assassination mission.

Only some ANBU members and other people in the hierarchy of Konoha were privy to the unvarnished truth.

Nowadays, Konoha possessed a reputation for being soft-hearted, but that was not always the case. Once upon a time, Konohagakure was another little pissant village. The leaf village's reputation as a major shinobi power was built upon the blood of its enemies and patriots. Before the advent of the modern organization of ANBU, Konohagakure relied on individual shinobi for black ops missions. Back then, a single capable nin was burdened with the work of what entire ANBU teams were given nowadays. For all their relatively small numbers, these proto-ANBU made up for with skill and viciousness.

In all the references Kakashi heard of relating to this elite group, one dominant figure was mentioned in hushed tones with nothing but the highest respect as the meanest motherfucker of them all.

The Executioner.

An uncharacteristically disturbed Hatake Kakashi leveled an accusing finger at the leader of his village, stating, "You are a bad man."

The one-eyed nin then leveled a finger at Umino Iruka as well, remarking, "And you… …you're the friend of a bad man."

Iruka just looked bewildered as he watched the jounin quickly make his exit

The Sandaime had the decency to not chuckle.

"Does that mean that Team 7 passes, Hokage-sama?"

Umino Iruka took the Sandaime's laughter as an affirmative.

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Hatake Kakashi reflected on his first meeting with team 7, and on every cut, and every bruise.

Being a pragmatist, Kakashi knew it was all his fault. It was his encounter to lose or win. If he had only taken them seriously from the beginning, things could have gone much more smoothly.

Being blindsided by a genin who was technically dead-last at the academy, if only Uchiha Obito could see him now. The happy-go-lucky Uchiha would've had a field day.

Hell, it would have been a freaking dream-come-true for Obito.

Now, because of his own arrogance and ignorance, the sole survivor of Team Minato had a genin team of his own to deal with.

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._

To relive the pains of his past was the last thing he had ever wanted, but they had earned it.

They were his now, and he'd be damned if they ended up the same as his last team.

Like Obito, who sacrificed his life to save a comrade.

Like Minato-sensei, trading his soul to defeat the nine-tailed fox demon.

Like Rin, captured by a squad of iwa-nin, tortured, raped, and ultimately killed.

The loss of his team, his surrogate family, jaded Kakashi so badly that he retreated inwardly, performing his missions efficiently, doing little else. He was a consummate professional, always getting the job done.

They made him an ANBU commander for that.

Despite the harder missions, being a part of Konoha's ANBU forces was easier for Kakashi than having a team.

He was greeted with respect and admiration rather than affection. The ninjas he worked with didn't try to become his friends. They clearly understood the life and death nature of their line of work. Instead, they were comrades.

Team Minato was his family.

This was the reason why Kakashi's graduation tests were so demanding compared to other jounin. He secretly hoped to never be in charge of a genin team.

It was the same reason he preferred the straightforward narratives of Jiraya's writings compared to the company of his peers.

In Jiraiya's stories, the endings were usually happy and, at worst, bittersweet.

The happy endings in the Icha Icha series did not exist like that in real life.

All true stories ended in death.

Kakashi found that out years ago when he was helpless to stop Rin's torment. Upon finding Rin's cooling body, he had mowed down every member of the iwa-nin squad responsible. Kakashi did so with Obito's eye at his disposal, and with the usage of the newly-dubbed raikiri, having just pierced through an expert raiton user and his prized lightning bolt jutsu.

Team 7 would not end up like Team Minato, Kakashi decided. Even if they ended up hating him for it, the members of Team 7 would thrive as shinobi, together.

Kakashi had a lot of legacies to uphold, but he would do his duty as he always did.

It was time to get cleaned up, and then address an issue of vital importance concerning his new genin team.

A team, like a length of chain, was only as good as its weakest link..

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Haruno Sakura was combing her hair in front of her bedroom mirror before heading to sleep.

Suddenly, the reflection of a tall, silver-haired figure in dark ANBU-style armor appeared behind her. He had the hilt of a short sword poking out from behind his back and full equipment pouches brimming with kunai and shuriken.

The pink-haired girl let out a high-pitched scream of terror.

"Yo."

The silver-haired jounin waved.

"Ack! What are you doing in my room, Kakashi-sensei?!"

"As you witnessed earlier today, I had a wake up call. Because of it, I am now responsible for your life, and your possible death."

Haruno Sakura nodded, confused, and not just a little bit intimidated.

"Being a shinobi is a not a game for children. To prepare, I will train you until you hate me, and until you are competent, and hopefully to where you can give your teammates a run for their money. I'll expect the best from you, because, as an active duty kunoichi in a prospective heavy assault team, you cannot afford anything less. In battle, if you take your new role and responsibilities lightly, you will be killed instantly, and at worst you will captured alive and tormented in ways that most male shinobi will never experience."

Sakura shuddered in revulsion at the thought.

Kakashi tossed her a small parcel.

"What is this?" wondered the young girl out loud.

The jounin smiled through his facemask.

"Those are mercy capsules. You could swallow one whole and it will pass through you system, but biting down on one will kill you quickly and painlessly. Some nin carry them around in their mouths on missions to avoid being captured alive. Also, in a pinch, you could break up the capsules and use the same poison against your enemies."

In an instant, Kakashi turned deadly serious.

"Take your training seriously, or get used to the idea of biting down on a capsule to avoid a fate worse than death. Alright?"

Sakura, frightened and numb, merely nodded.

Kakashi tousled her hair playfully.

"I used to be an ANBU commander, so I'll train you guys in the tricks of the trade. I'll focus on you especially, because I hope it'll never come to that."

With a small wave, the jounin vanished.

Sakura stared in shock at the small package in her hands.

Just what kind of team did she end up on where a jounin-sensei gives suicide pills to his subordinates as a friendly gesture?

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Sleep did not come easily for Uzumaki Naruto.

If fact, it was excruciating.

He had been fighting for hours, but it may as well have been days or weeks as faceless shades descended upon him in his sleep. Sometimes they bore various weapons, and sometimes brutal techniques. At times, they attacked him one on one or en masse with vicious teamwork.

The only things that were constant were that they were utterly relentless, and utterly skilled, and they always won in the end.

How well he dodged or struck did not matter.

No matter how many he killed, he would eventually falter and be killed in return. Impaled, burned, throat cut and gasping for life, Naruto could not rest as he found himself whole again and again, and beset by mysterious enemies.

Every time the shadows overwhelmed him, Naruto felt an irrational desire to rage against fate with every dying breath. This frenzied instinct for survival grew more intense with each successive defeat, and against increasingly bleak odds.

Even if a brutal death was his inevitable future, Uzumaki Naruto would not be broken.

Even if the effort was ultimately futile, he would fight tooth and nail.

After what seemed like an eternity, Naruto woke up sweat-drenched and exhausted, curled up on San's couch.

Relating his dream vividly to San, the old man simply smiled a knowing smile and nodded in approval.

"Naruto, sometimes a person chooses an art, and sometimes an art chooses its practitioner. Your dream suggests the latter. You know what this means, boy?"

Naruto shook his head.

San summoned a knife to his right hand.

"You were born for this. It's in your blood."

San dispelled the knife and turned to his blonde student.

"Let's move. It's time to cash in a favor that the Sandaime owes me. Believe me, you'll love it."

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End Chapter 9

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C&C welcome


	10. A Conspiracy of Old Men

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 10: A Conspiracy of Old Men

By: BukkakeNoJutsu

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Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine, but, if he were, he would've been Hokage already, and he would've earned it.

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Uchiha Sasuke was dealing with a serious dilemma.

His balls ached because of Uzumaki Naruto.

It was not because of any underlying attraction between fellow orphans. No, they literally ached because the blonde-haired, blue-eyed devil had the gall to gleefully stomp on them, as if he were attempting to distill a fine wine made from the pulpy remains of the last Uchiha's junk.

Instead of dealing with a final academy exam, Sasuke was treated to the one-sided fight equivalent of a public execution.

In a few short seconds, the whiskered boy unknowingly threatened Sasuke's ambitions to repopulate his clan and to kill his older brother with an eye jab and a groin stomp.

After many applications of an ice pack, and one disastrous experiment with an analgesic balm to the affected area, he regained a pained, yet workable, kind of mobility.

But just when everything had once again started to regain a semblance of normality, Uzumaki Naruto yet again complicated matters. Somehow, the infuriatingly capable blonde single-handedly took down a jounin. Worst of all, Sasuke had no clear idea how Naruto accomplished such a feat. It happened all so quickly and ended with a huge explosion. Sasuke's pride and ego would not allow him to ask the blonde straight out how he did so.

Sasuke would find out Uzumaki Naruto's secrets sooner or later, but he had other issues that were more pressing at the moment.

His injuries were still quite tender.

After he nursed his abused groin back to health, much like a mama bird would her fledgling chicks, he would then figure out a way to surpass Naruto, by any means necessary.

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There were times where the Sandaime was glad to have someone like San around. Having a comrade who lived and remembered Konoha's history and could reminisce as well as he did was a great thing to have at times.

This was not one of those times.

"Are you fucking serious?"

Uzumaki Naruto stared at his Hokage in shock, hearing the normally kind and dignified man swear out loud for the first time ever.

San calmly repeated his request.

"I want _you_ to teach the boy the very first kinjutsu you ever invented. The S-rank one. Not that pansy-ass A-rank 'you could die from chakra exaustion' bullshit, but the very same technique that laid you out for weeks."

The Sandaime was clearly upset.

"You do know that if I tried to do that technique as I am right now, it could very well kill me, not to mention of what it would do to our young Naruto here."

"I'm not asking you to actually do the technique, just teach the boy how to do it." replied San, throwing his hands up in the air almost as if he were talking to a child who couldn't follow his logic.

Uzumaki Naruto looked understandably concerned at the mention of the mystery jutsu's lethality to its user.

San continued his reasoning, undeterred.

"It's perfect for the boy. He already knows the kage bunshin, and has the necessary chakra reserves, and his chakra control is getting much better."

"But it's the most painful technique I have ever had the misfortune to come across. It's not even _that_ powerful. Even now, I can close my eyes and still feel my skin blistering and lungs scorching. Why would you seek to inflict such an atrocity on Naruto?"

pleaded the Hokage.

"Yeah, why?" chirped in the blonde boy finally, with his hands on his hips.

San looked at the two people in front of him, one being his oldest friend and the other one the closest thing he had to a grandson, and he sighed.

"It's actually pretty simple. Genjutsu is one of the areas that I have never really trained you in, Naruto. It's not my forte. Most genjutsus are easy to dispel, and I've shown you how to do so, but the most lethal illusions you will come across will trick the mind into killing the body. They cause a person to give up, because a victim of high-level genjutsu is subjected to unfathomable pain. If you learn this technique, you'll learn the type of pain that can't be matched by anyone's overactive imagination."

San shrugged.

"The fact that this technique can be used offensively is just an added bonus."

The Sandaime felt more than a little sick knowing that San intended to use his kinjutsu for endurance training.

The Hokage felt the need to inform Uzumaki Naruto exactly what the technique was.

"Decades ago, when the usage of suicidal jutsu was fairly common, I tried to adapt one that converts a healthy ninja into a living, breathing, flaming time bomb into a less than lethal technique. I had the brilliant idea to create a reinforced clone that would use the devastating jutsu, leaving the user unharmed. Do you know what happens when you dispel a kage bunshin, Naruto?"

The whiskered young boy thought for a second before answering, "Don't you get information and memories from it?"

"Right, but what I did not know was that the more potent you make a clone, the closer your connection to it. When my clone detonated, I received not only its memories, but its exact physical sensations and state of mind. I felt as if I had sacrificed my life and my dreams for one suicidal attack. I was the one who burned inside and out. The phantom sensations of pain you feel with this technique can't be dulled by anything except time. Do you really want to experience that?"

After considering his options for a few moments, Naruto asked the only question that nagged at him.

"Exactly how big of an explosion are talking about here?"

Naruto grinned.

The Sandaime shuddered.

San nodded, amused by his protégé's query.

The Hokage, stunned, looked at San and then to the blonde genin and said, "Naruto, could you step outside, and give San and I a few moments to speak alone?"

The Uzumaki boy shrugged and then left the room. Immediately when he did, the Professor performed a short sequence of handseals casting a flickering barrier encompassing both men.

"Just what the hell are you getting at, San? Why this desperate kind of training?"

San smirked as if sharing an inside joke.

"Blood runs true, Sarutobi. Do you know of the boy's ultimate ambition to become Hokage?"

"Of course," the old man nodded, "He's made no secret of it."

"In a few years, could you think of a better successor than Naruto?"

The Sandaime shook his head.

"Many people in Konoha would be gravely upset and target Naruto for outright assassination if they found me favoring him, people like Danzo."

"Fuck Danzo. Remember when Minato secured his nomination as Yondaime Hokage?"

Both men had a chuckle at that memory. The young blonde man had offered to display the skill level required of a Hokage candidate by challenging all of the people who objected to his nomination at once. He led all of the objectors, including the infamous nin Orochimaru, to a training field to take them on. Holding up a fat, uncapped red marker to stand in for a real kunai, the blonde jounin challenged everyone to come at him freely with the intent to kill. Somewhere along the way, Namikaze Minato failed to mention that he had previously had seeded the training ground with hiraishin tags, a lot of them. In a flash, all the objectors suddenly had red lines and dots across their throats, hearts and other vital areas.

"In the future, Naruto'll be able to do the same kind of thing but with a real kunai and without all the fancy jutsu-slinging."

The Hokage almost snorted, "It's amazing the lengths you'll go to leave a legacy in Konoha."

San smiled, "Don't get me wrong, but I have the strange feeling that even without my interference, Naruto's the type of person who would become Hokage through sheer determination and grit. You don't know that boy like I do."

The Sandaime considered the future of Konoha far beyond his own lifetime and nodded.

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In the end, the Hokage acquiesced, agreeing to instruct Naruto starting sometime in the next week.

With their objective accomplished, San and Naruto headed off to train after having breakfast.

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Uchiha Sasuke had just gotten extremely lucky.

He had managed to stumble across Naruto training with an old man. It was actually kind of disheartening. There were no flashy techniques, gouts of fire, or crackling electricity. All that Naruto did was leisurely evade the old man's sword strikes.

Truth be told, after a while, it was kind of boring to watch. There were no clones, explosions, or illusions.

Sasuke actually yawned.

The old man paused in his movements and spoke aloud.

"You might as well come out of hiding now. I know you've been watching for while. If you're that bored, I can always carve your eyes out of your skull and replace them with your testicles for trying to steal my techniques."

Sasuke immediately left his hiding spot.

San turned towards his student.

"Can you vouch for this asshole?"

"That's one of my new teammates Uchiha Sasuke. He's alright, but he's kind of a dick," shrugged Naruto.

"That makes sense. All the Uchiha men I've known were either arrogant bastards or psychos or a vicious mix of the two."

Sasuke started to feel anger at the old man's comments.

"The women I'll miss. I never partook because I was a married man, but the stories I could tell you of the dark-haired beauty Uchiha Mikoto and her magic fingers, or the talents of her cousins. Those gals inspired volumes of literature."

San looked at the newcomer strangely.

"Hey boy, I thought only your eyes were supposed to turn red, not your whole face."

Being a mama's boy, Uchiha Sasuke rushed at San, screaming, "I'll kill you!"

San turned to Naruto remarking, "He's obviously delusional. I'm guessing he's more like a crazy-type Uchiha then."

Barreling forward, Sasuke started to form handseals.

San calmly unsheathed his sword.

Naruto snorted, and waited for the carnage to unfold.

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End Chapter 10

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C&C welcome


	11. Insights at the Edge of a Blade

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 11: Insights at the Edge of a Blade

By: BukkakeNoJutsu

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Disclaimer: The Naruto series is not mine, but Kishimoto could totally borrow San from me if he wanted to. He'd just have to okay it with San first. Good luck with that.

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For most shinobi of the elemental countries, the usage of edged weaponry was purely pragmatic. The typical ninja generally learned the simplest and most effective ways of killing with a blade.

What use would there be in learning about various subtleties, such as historical and cultural contexts concerning a given weapon art? Many shinobi, including the Seven Swordsmen of the Village Hidden in the Mist, followed this widely accepted tendency. After all, what use is subtlety for a ninja like Hoshigaki Kisame who wields a semi-sentient chakra-devouring sword that is taller than most men?

San of Konohagakure was unlike most ninjas.

The wizened old man knew that most ninjas were only looking for instant gratification concerning battle effectiveness, and were disinterested in anything much more in depth. This is why numbers of medic-nin were always notoriously few, and numbers of fuinjutsu exponents even lower.

That was also why San, with all his worldly wisdom and eloquence, often referred to most ninjas as "stupid fucking idiots."

It wasn't that the approach in training only the simplest and most effective techniques didn't produce good ninjas. It did. Unfortunately, this narrow-minded focus tended to stunt a person's growth in the long run.

San was not interested at all in mere battlefield effectiveness. Decades of field experience already ingrained in him an effortless and frightening efficiency.

No, San was interested in absolute mastery of edged weaponry. To San, this entailed becoming an expert in various subtleties. This was why it was a necessity to teach Uzumaki Naruto about the origins of the fighting art they both practiced and the reasons for why it existed.

Even an idiot could copy a movement if given enough repetitions. To San, there was no skill in it. He knew that there was much more to the path of mastery than learning a sequence of movements. More than knowing movements, a person had to understand the mindset of the art they practiced. It was better to understand the essence of an art rather than it's base mechanics. If one focused purely on the base mechanics, one could not improvise, improve, and ultimately master an art. If a shinobi was keenly in tune with the spirit of his or her art, then the base mechanics of their extrapolations and improvisations would more often than not be just as effective or even more effective than what they were originally taught.

In battle, you _had_ to improvise.

From firsthand experience, San knew that one was not always fortunate enough to have access to an outrageously powerful weapon like the famed swords of the Seven Swordsmen of Kirigakure or the Nidaime's Raijin.

Shit, often on the field you'd have to make due even without basic supplies.

A ninja had to be sharp enough to use any tool, any advantage that could come their way against a sea of disadvantages.

One of San's most memorable examples of battlefield improvisation occurred when he had run out of kunai and was only armed with a single sword. In order to protect the life of a wounded comrade and being too far away to physically engage the enemy, he had used a child's discarded paper airplane, reinforced and weighed down with chakra, as a deadly projectile. The enemy nin was briefly distracted by a swiftly approaching whistling sound before the top half of his skull was just as swiftly separated from the bottom half.

Watching Uchiha Sasuke barrel towards him with his chakra blazing, San surmised that the angry young man didn't know a damn thing about subtlety.

Feeling generous, the old man felt like sharing.

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There were times where Uzumaki Naruto utterly loathed the three minutes it took to prepare instant ramen.

This was one of those times.

By the time a bowl of instant ramen would be ready to eat, Sasuke's little temper tantrum would have already been snuffed out by an icy cold dose of reality provided by San.

The simple actions of pulling out a thermos and applying hot water to dry noodles could cause him to miss something.

Missing the opportunity to watch San in action was something Naruto had no intention of doing. Despite seeing the old man's skills on a daily basis, watching San with a sword was something the young blond boy had never gotten tired of.

It was hard to describe, but it had an entirely different feel from when San played around with knives.

Naruto once tried voicing his observation to San, and the old man chuckled. It was not the kind of humor that suggested the old man was having fun at the expense of his student, but rather that he was amused by an inside joke Naruto did not yet understand.

He explained, "Boy, playing with knives is a game for young men. It's all mobility and viciousness. Swords are perfect for an old bastard like myself, so I can be lazy as well as vicious at my advanced age."

They both laughed at that.

San with a sword was anything but lazy, Naruto thought. A good word to describe it would be "perfect."

The old man moved only as much as he needed to. He didn't need to flip around and fling fire all over the fucking place, but he could if he wanted to.

San with a knife was brutal and nasty, but with a sword in hand he was picture of calm and poise, and just as deadly.

It was downright annoying to deal with. His movements were deceptively simple, but they were perfect in both timing and distance.

Naruto knew that any holes that appeared in the old man's defenses were simply illusions. San would purposely leave openings with his postures, casually inviting attack. For his opponents, targeting anywhere else made absolutely no sense. In reality, San was baiting an opponent into attacking an area he could easily defend, and where he could attack and counterattack without overextending himself.

It was devious, and deeply appealed to the prankster within Uzumaki Naruto.

Essentially, you were screwed if you tried to attack or not.

For all intents and purposes, San might as well be wielding a magic wand instead of a sword, considering how he caused bellies to open and extremities to disappear.

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Naruto's mentor was quite used to feeling the sensations of hate and killing intent being projected towards him. After killing enough people and paying enough attention, San was able to differentiate between various types of hatred and killing intent as if he were a connoisseur of fine wine.

There was the standard "You killed my sibling/parent/teammate/squad/lover, prepare to die!" type of hate.

There was also the self-destructive "I hate you so much I'll take you down at the cost of my own life" kind.

There was even the type that seemed too challenging to encapsulate with simple words as in "Fuck you, you fucking…fucker…arrrghh!!!"

The Uchiha boy was filled to the brim with hatred and anger, but, oddly enough, not all of it was directed towards San. It was as if Uchiha Sasuke was gearing up for a marathon of hate and the white-haired man in front of him represented only the first three blocks of it.

To be honest, San couldn't help but feel vaguely insulted as he casually dodged a number of small fireballs containing shuriken.

It all made sense given the boy's history though.

Uchiha Itachi massacred his entire clan, save for his younger brother, to secure his title as the undisputed king of all psychotic assholes.

San acknowledged that the boy had better reasons than most to hate so fiercely, but it seemed as if the boy had internalized that trauma, and hollowed himself out to feel nothing but hatred. Although he was no Yamanaka, San had a sinking feeling in his gut that, if left unchecked; this would not end well for the Uchiha boy or for Konohagakure.

He had seen this and similar situations far too many times in the past.

This would not do at all.

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Uzumaki Naruto was entirely correct about not having enough time to even start preparing a bowl of instant ramen.

San made his move while an airborne Sasuke, wielding fistfuls of kunai, was in the midst of an impressive looking taijutsu maneuver.

The wiry old man simply evaded and ended the fight with two whirling cuts.

The first cut drew a line through both of Sasuke's eyes and the bridge of his nose. Before Sasuke could even feel his sinuses filling with blood, San last cut passed though his throat.

Moving again instinctively to avoid the blood spray, San observed the last Uchiha in Konoha as he gripped his throat helplessly and collapsed to his knees as if trying to will himself to stay conscious.

He could not succeed.

Naruto finally exhaled a breath he did not know he had been holding in.

The blond boy made his way to his teammate, and nudged his convulsing body with his foot.

"Hey Gramps! Aren't you gonna heal him or something? 'Cuz he could die, right?"

The concern was blatant in Naruto's voice.

"Yes. Yes he could," replied San simply observing, but making no move to help the Uchiha.

The older shinobi's reply did nothing to assuage Naruto's worries.

"Old man…"

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Sasuke's life flashed before his eyes in bits and pieces. It was full of little moments he tried to forget, things like the scent of his mother's hair, or a lullaby she would sing, or the times his father would tuck him in at night after telling him stories of heroic ninjas.

Some memories were quite random like having breakfast with an aunt whose name he could not quite remember, or training with wooden kunai or tag with his older cousins, or snippets of arguments or jokes.

He saw some times he desperately tried to repress like the times he remembered admiring and loving his older brother with the purity only a child had and the times he watched his family die while in the embrace of Itachi's genjutsu.

The Uchiha then relived some moments from the recent months and years of his life. He could remember ignoring his loneliness, and trying to fill the deadness he felt inside with anger.

"So this is what my life of an avenger amounts to… …not a damn thing" thought Sasuke bitterly as the stream of memories abruptly ceased.

Although he was no longer flashing through his life, there was still a sensation of forward movement. He was moving towards a light in the distance, and as he sped closer he could see the silhouettes of the members of his long lost family. They seemed surprised, yet overjoyed to see him. Voices he hadn't heard in years called out to him.

He was continuing onward and as their features became clearer, soon they would be close enough to touch if he reached out to them.

Then he woke up.

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Sasuke sat up and wiped the liquid from his eyes expecting to find blood. He felt like a wound from which a scab had been ripped, but only water appeared on his fingertips. Sasuke didn't even know when he had started crying or even the last time he had wept. It felt like it had been years.

San's gravelly voice rang out.

"That was no genjutsu, boy. That's what happens sometimes when you come awfully close to dying."

"Why?" asked Sasuke, close to sobbing now. "I-I could almost touch them again."

San wiped the sweat off his brow with his forearm.

"If a bone gets broken, and doesn't heal right, it'll come out all crooked. Sometimes the answer is to re-break the bone so it can heal proper and turn out stronger than before. People are like bones this way."

San affixed the Uchiha with a steely-eyed glare.

"If you try to forget and make yourself numb, you will never heal. You'll turn into another walking-tragedy in the making, doomed to repeat your past either as a victim again or playing the part of Itachi for someone else."

San looked to both Naruto and Sasuke this time.

"We've all got to learn from the events that hurt us, otherwise we aren't worth a damn in this world."

Naruto felt distinctly uncomfortable with this conversation with Sasuke breaking down and all. He hadn't ever expected the dark-haired boy to ever look so…human. They weren't really friends at all, but Naruto still felt he had to do something.

After Sasuke composed himself some more, Naruto offered him the bowl of instant ramen he had originally prepared for himself.

"Take it. I'm not that hungry." The blond blatantly lied.

The Uchiha boy accepted the bowl with a barely audible mumble quite possibly indicating his thanks.

San nodded to Naruto.

"We should head out soon, boy."

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When San and Naruto departed, Sasuke lingered for a while to collect his thoughts.

He still ate the ramen before it went cold though.

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"Yo gramps. What was that whole thing with Sasuke about?" asked Naruto on the way back to the village."

"I guess you could call it 'tough love' in addition to the fact that I've grown soft in my old age."

"Yeah, soft a like cut across the eyes," snickered Naruto.

"I'm serious," replied San. "The last person I showed "tough love" to permanently lost an eye and an arm. It was a shame since he enjoyed playing the guitar so much. I'd feel almost guilty if he were any good at it, but since he sucked I don't."

San smiled viciously.

Somewhere in a secret underground bunker beneath Konohagakure, Danzo , the leader of the ANBU splinter group Root, sneezed violently, almost cracking a rib and scattering his carefully compiled secret documents all over the dirt floor.

"Fuck…Arrghh!!"

As he bent over to pick up and compile his documents single-handedly, Danzo lamented the loss of his arm and cursed ever having met San and Sarutobi.

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End Chapter 11

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C&C Welcome.


	12. Nose to the Grindstone

Lessons of Experience

Chapter 12: Nose to the Grindstone

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Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine. That's why Sasuke, post-Time Skip, is still an unrepentant jackass.

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All the training and preparation had finally paid off, thought Uchiha Sasuke, as he withdrew his sword from his older brother's back with deliberate slowness.

The youngest Uchiha did this in as roughly a manner as possible to slide his blade harshly on Itachi's ribs. The scrape of steel against bone was music to Sasuke's ears as if Itachi were a violin and his sword a bow.

For Sasuke, Itachi's suffering was a musical note he wanted to prolong indefinitely. It colored the air and made the world seem rosy. He wanted to bask in it if he could.

As with all things, it could not last forever.

With his sword finally free and with a single motion, he decapitated Itachi, letting the traitor's head fell to the ground with his body slumping soon after.

Sasuke sank to his knees in exhaustion, breathing heavily. He had avenged his clan, and pitted his Mangekyo Sharingan against his brother's ultimately emerging victorious.

A foreign feeling of elation welled inside Sasuke.

Now he could rebuild his clan, and make the Uchiha, once again, into a force to be reckoned with.

The sound of mocking laughter disturbed Sasuke's rare moment of peace.

Despite being separated from the majority of his body, Itachi's red eyes snapped open.

"Did you think it would be that easy, little brother?"

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Sasuke awoke on a training ground tasting dirt and blood.

Sitting up, he tenderly probed his mouth with his tongue, finding some teeth barely set in bloodied gums.

If he was this badly thrashed, what happened to the other guy?

Oh yeah… He was in pristine condition.

He found his sparring partner, the one who had mashed him into bean paste, and his teacher running through some taijutsu exercises.

Sasuke sighed, much like the last gasp of air from a deflating balloon.

How did he ever get into this mess?

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-One Week Ago-

Due to a lifetime of pursuing the art of sword mastery despite his poor health, Gekkou Hayate had been forced to learn patience and watchfulness.

As a result, he was a jounin who was very rarely ever caught off guard, but when Hatake Kakashi dropped from his ceiling in dark blue skirmish armor just as he was enjoying a cup of morning coffee, he squealed like a little girl.

Hayate immediately tried to play it off by coughing immediately afterwards.

If the silver-haired jounin was amused, he made no mention of it.

"What the hell, Kakashi? Are we under attack?" questioned Hayate looking side to side, trying to keep his voice level to avoid straining himself.

Kakashi shook his head.

"I wanted to ask for your help. I need a few pointers with this."

The armored jounin then withdrew the weapon sheathed at his back, not bothering to activate it.

Hayate was a kenjutsu expert and all-around sword geek. He had long since worn out his first copy of "Famous Swords of the Shinobi World" as a child. Even if he had never seen it up close before, there was no mistaking the reforged White Chakra Sabre that had once belonged to Hatake Sakumo the White Fang.

"Sweet, shivering fuck,"

Hayate's eyes grew wide.

"Is that what I think it is?"

Kakashi nodded, handing the weapon to Hayate.

The swordsman ignored the urge to cradle the weapon to his chest like a mother reunited with her long lost child. With the blade in his hands, he was starting to salivate. A dark part of himself wanted him to take the sword and run away cackling. After taking a few deep breaths, he swallowed his spit and instead questioned this odd turn of events.

"Um…why do need help with this anyway? Did you finally challenge Gai to a deathmatch or what?"

Hayate pointed to Kakashi's outfit

"That would explain the body armor."

The masked man shook his head.

"It's worse than that…"

The sickly man snapped his fingers in realization.

"I've got it! One of those swordsmen of the mist is ransoming your porn, right?"

Kakashi groaned and resisted the urge to slap Hayate.

"Words fail to describe just how entirely off the mark you are."

Hayate shrugged in response.

"What then?"

Kakashi mumbled something under his breath, and his facemask made it damn near impossible for Hayate to read his lips.

"I'm sorry, but I didn't catch that," apologized the swordmaster

"I've got a genin team," stated Kakashi quietly.

Peripherally, Hayate had been given vague impressions of Kakashi's past over the years. They were not particularly close, and the silver-haired man was notoriously close-mouthed when it came to his past. Even in Konohagakure where everyone and their grandmother had a tragic past, Hatake Kakashi's past was still an ugly clusterfuck of lost parents and teammates.

Because of this, no one begrudged Hatake Kakashi his little orange books or his maddeningly difficult genin tests. Veteran shinobi were notorious for having various quirks to keep themselves sane.

"So is this what this overkill is for? How did they manage to pass?"

Kakashi choked off the beginning of a sigh, knowing that this was something that would be hard to live down.

"It was my fight to lose. In my arrogance, I was blindsided by the most devious prankster to ever graduate from the academy and a bunch of explosive tags."

The word "prankster" seemed to resonate with Hayate.

"Wait… the Uzumaki kid? I didn't know he had it in him."

"Yep."

Hayate let out a low whistle.

His only personal experience with the blonde boy stemmed from a number of chases involving the Uzumaki child needing to be apprehended after a prank. The word chase, for the sickly shinobi, was a relative term. Because of his frail constitution, Hayate disliked long-distance sprinting. He could strut with the best of them, but he didn't run from danger. His talent was in being able to cut any obstacles in half. Needless to say, his short pursuits of the Uzumaki prankster were not entirely successful.

Hayate's train of thought was derailed as the silver-haired nin continued.

"Apparently, he got himself apprenticed to an old-timer, an elite who goes by the name 'The Executioner,' "

Kakashi mentioned this in an off-hand manner, almost too relaxed to be natural.

The sickly jounin's complexion seemed to get even paler. He didn't recognize the codename, but the words "elite" and "old-timer" did not get bandied around Konoha lightly, and especially not by someone of Kakashi's caliber.

"Haruno Sakura. Uzumaki Naruto. Uchiha Sasuke. My genin have more potential than I know what to do with right now, and I need to knock the rust off if I want to do my job right."

Gekko Hayate nodded at Kakashi's assessment and handed the chakra blade to its proper owner.

"Okay then. Let's see what you've got."

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Haruno Sakura was beginning to hate Kakashi-sensei.

Maybe more so than Ino-pig, and probably coming a close second to her childhood bully Ami.

She had been lulled into a false sense of security when Team 7 reconvened. Kakashi-sensei actually apologized for underestimating them and promised them his best behavior.

Sasuke almost snorted in disbelief, Naruto's fingers twitched towards his sheathed knives, and Sakura breathed a sigh of relief.

Maybe that suicide capsule talk was a fluke, Sakura had hoped. He looked professional and alert, very much like a textbook example of a proper shinobi.

The lightly armored man offered them all a rematch, along with a masked grin. No bells this time, just sparring.

Sasuke was the first to take him up on his offer, wanting to test his limits.

Kakashi released a wave of killing intent that seemed to weigh down the air.

He intercepted the Uchiha's charge, and simultaneously pulled out a kunai. The masked man blurred, staking Sasuke's arms to a tree with his one blade through both of the genin's wrists.

It was all too fast for her to make out, and she cried out helpless. Trying to move through the jounin's killing intent was like trying to move through quicksand. The psychic pressure was making it hard for her to breathe.

The jounin stopped with a fresh kunai at Sasuke's throat. The helpless genin was pinned like a butterfly in an entomologist's display.

"Watch and learn…" said the jounin pleasantly.

In contrast to the swiftness of his previous action, Kakashi drew his knife with exquisite slowness.

Sasuke wanted to clutch his desperate hands to his opened throat, but could not.

Sakura was bawling, feeling useless and afraid.

The air shifted again and Sakura could now move.

Where was Sasuke? She had to help him!

The Uchiha was buried up to his neck in dirt, with Kakashi-sensei crouched beside him, his outfit free from bloodstains,

Naruto was beside her, looking quite pale, stealing glances at her through the corner of his eyes with relief.

What had he seen?

The blond had ruthlessly shoved one of his knives though the palm of his left hand to dispel the jounin's genjutsu.

While Naruto was recovering from whatever visions of hell he had witnessed, Haruno Sakura was still hyperventilating, her heart racing.

She collapsed to her knees.

This was just the start of their team training.

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The pink-haired girl had idly hoped before that her future jounin-sensei would be able to make her into a respectable shinobi.

This was not how she envisioned things.

In the upcoming days, Kakashi had zeroed in on her shortcomings, specifically her lack of physical stamina.

He started to wake her up for leisurely morning jogs. Apparently for Kakashi-sensei, "leisurely morning jog" meant using a sharp jab between he shoulder blades with a pointed stick as an incentive to not be lazy.

Worse yet, the masked jounin had creatively used a number of "incentives" to inspire Sakura such as being chased by nin-dogs, an unsharpened stick covered in droppings from aforementioned nin-dogs that he used to threaten her lustrous hair, and even cattle prod crackling with electricity.

"Yeowch!! You motherfucker!"

While these morning jogs were helping tremendously with her stamina, they did nothing to treat Sakura's developing case of potty mouth.

Kakashi smirked at her growing bloodlust. Sometimes, his genin were so adorable.

"Sakura, if you've got energy to complain, you have enough energy to jog faster."

During their infrequent breaks, Sakura would look over the various pamphlets, manuals, and tomes her sensei would lend her. She was in the midst of _Psychological Warfare and You_ by Morino Ibiki, and still had _P is for Poisoning the Fuck Out of Your Enemies_ untouched.

Kakashi encouraged her to train her mind whenever she was not training her body.

One morning post-jog, Haruno Sakura had the misfortune to run into Yamanaka Ino who was, as usual, looking fabulous.

Sakura heard a grinding sound. When she realized it was her teeth, she stopped.

Ino greeted her with her usual lack of tact.

"Hi Forehead. You look like shit."

The blonde girl's nose twitched in distaste.

"You kind of smell like it, too…"

Ino giggled.

For Sakura, the grinding sound returned accompanied by the clenching of the pink-haired girls fists.

Ino looked immaculate because her fucking jounin-sensei didn't prod her along on a death march with a stick covered in dog poop.

Sakura did something neither girl expected.

She simply followed Ino's old advice of "putting her forehead to good use" by sending it on a trajectory coinciding with the blonde's jaw. Yes, Sakura floored Ino with a head butt in a manner that would have made the most hardened professional soccer player wince. She then followed it up a kick to a downed Ino's head that, if televised, would have prompted an announcer to scream "Gooooooooaaaaaaaaaalllllllllllllll!!!" at the top of his lungs.

Haruno Sakura took a deep breath to calm herself.

Maybe her training was paying off after all.

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Damn it! Was it so difficult to blow yourself up with chakra?

Uzumaki Naruto cursed his slow progress with the Sandaime's forbidden technique as he stiffly made his way to team training, smelling and feeling like he had fallen into a deep fryer.

Sasuke gave him a curious glance that Naruto pre-empted by stating, "Don't ask. Honestly, you'd rather not know."

The Uchiha frowned, either as a semi-concerned teammate or petulant child. At this point in time, Naruto didn't particularly which one it was.

Naruto's training session with the Sandaime had started off well with the Hokage showing him the basics of the actual suicide technique. He needed to learn how to fatally direct all his chakra to his heart, isolating and condensing it there, until everything burst before he could have a reinforced clone do it.

The problem was isolating and maintaining chakra in a specific area. The heart was the center of the chakra circulatory system so, if you pushed chakra in, chakra would naturally flow out into other areas of the body.

It was much easier to die of chakra exhaustion or cause cardiac arrest instead because you burnt out tenketsu in your chest.

It sounded simple. Overload the death gate-thing, then boom.

It kinda sucked to learn, because, if he did it for real, he would die and if he messed up he'd get the same result sans explosion.

He contented himself by closing his eyes and getting a feel for the chakra flowing through his chest, occasionally giving himself heartburn as if he ate one too many bowls at Ichiraku's.

He tentatively explored using greater amounts of chakra.

When a child popped of nowhere to interrupt the Sandaime's instructions with a thrown blunted kunai, Naruto's delicate control flew out the window, especially since the inexpertly thrown kunai smacked the blond in the face. The pain caused his chakra to surge before releasing, leaving him slightly scorched with a few burnt out tenketsu.

"Son of a-"

The Hokage sighed, feeling his age.

"Konohamaru, I told you to—"

The 3rd Hokage's forthcoming lecture was interrupted by Naruto, who dashed over to the younger boy and captured him in a headlock. The genin then applied a fierce noogie, rubbing his knuckles back and forth over the top of the brown-haired boy's head.

The Hokage sighed, watching the antics of those who would one day inherit the stewardship of Konohagakure.

Good lord, was that smoke from friction coming from his grandson's head?

That really wasn't one of his proudest moments, reflected Uzumaki Naruto.

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-2 Days Ago-

Uchiha Sasuke had made up his mind. He would calmly, even humbly, ask for instruction from Naruto's teacher.

He had days to think about it, and this was what he wanted.

Now if he could only locate Naruto. The whiskered boy had proven to be surprisingly adept at shaking off pursuers, and Sasuke's search was growing tiresome.

After some time, he had finally found the pair at some food stall, calmly enjoying their meals. Naruto eyed him warily, and the old man did so suspiciously.

Sasuke damn near prostrated himself, and made his request.

The old man regarded him for a second, and laughed hard.

It was deep belly laughter than ran roughshod over the remains of his Uchiha pride, and dragged it facedown through a field of rusty barbed wire.

The old man stated, "No, no, and never."

Sasuke felt the faintly glowing embers of his old anger rekindling.

"You wanna know why, boy?"

The Uchiha nodded, not trusting himself to speak clearly.

"That anger in your heart leaves very little room for Konoha. If you want power you can get it somewhere else, but not from me. There are plenty of others around if you keep your eyes open."

Not wanting to admit it but knowing the old man to be right, Sasuke walked away.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The last Uchiha in the village walked along various training grounds to clear his head.

That's where he found them, much like he did Naruto and his teacher.

They were inhuman blurs, striking fiercely and passionately. It was unlike anything he had ever seen.

Master and student paused to regard him in their strange garb.

"Yosh! Uchiha-san, would you like to train?"

Sasuke shrugged. It was not as if he had anything better to do.

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-Now-

Sasuke dropped to the ground gracelessly in a desperate effort to avoid another Konoha Whirlwind from Rock Lee.

He failed to dodge the vicious follow-up roundhouse to his face.

The Uchiha groaned as he bounced and slid along the ground.

Again.

What the hell? Was he ever going to win?

Maito Gai's voice rang out as loud and clear as a temple bell.

"Sasuke, do not get discouraged! If you can pull yourself up time after time, you'll never be truly defeated."

It felt like a trite saying, but their enthusiasm was infectious.

The Uchiha fought against cracking a grin, but, despite his goofy ass haircut, maybe Gai-sensei was right.

Maybe all he needed was a lot of hard work.

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End Chapter 12


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